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cartedor

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cartedor

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2030
  • Number of comments : 157
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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cartedor's page activity

Visits<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 10:13pm<b>ohhhhhhhhhyeah</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 1:33am<b>timtamslam</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 6:41am<b>xCommander</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 2:47am<b>zhaterminatah</b> - the 02/03/2013 at 11:34pm<b>Msawsome</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 1:31am<b>keyten1</b> - the 01/07/2013 at 10:02pm<b>turkturkington</b> - the 01/06/2013 at 5:28am

cartedor's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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cartedor's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my cat to the vet. He said he felt a strange lump that could be serious. I got really upset and picked her up, crying. The vet then told me I had to put her down. Absolutely devastated by having to euthanize my cat, I passed out. He meant I had to put her back on the table. FML

#7932396
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24772) - you deserved it (12800)

On 02/06/2010 at 10:19am - animals - by sadcat (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I did something clever at work and I was telling one of the other girls about it. I said "Just using my noodle" and went to tap my temple but instead I jabbed myself in the eye. FML

#7662711
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5171) - you deserved it (24048)

On 01/29/2010 at 12:10am - work - by ke (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, while in the waiting room at the chiropractor's office, I thought I'd be sexy and flash my boyfriend. Forgetting that my iPhone was in the front pocket of my hoodie, I lifted it quickly and hit myself in the mouth. Now I have a fat bloody lip and a boyfriend who can't stop laughing. FML

#7469171
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5825) - you deserved it (38295)

On 01/21/2010 at 2:31am - intimacy - by im_radd (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend dumped me so he could sleep with my mom without feeling guilty. FML

#7304423
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27675) - you deserved it (2460)

On 01/12/2010 at 6:54pm - intimacy - by notasgood (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was wearing a shirt that had a picture of a squirrel and acorns with a caption reading "Protect Your Nuts". My dad walked up to me, read my shirt, then punched me in the balls. FML

#7227808
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9340) - you deserved it (35960)

On 01/09/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by squirrel (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was walking out of Starbucks when I sneezed, causing coffee to burn my nose. I screamed, dropped it, and sent scorching coffee all over my legs while dropping everything else I was holding. FML

#7163475
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21450) - you deserved it (5796)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:58pm - misc - by SplashOuch (woman) - United States

Today, I had a blind date. When I arrived at our meeting place, I spotted my date, because he was the only one in the bar wearing a nametag. I walked up to him and asked, "Are you John?" He responded, "That depends. Are you Jen?" When I said yes he said, "Then no," and left. FML

#7056556
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30450) - you deserved it (3032)

On 12/31/2009 at 12:33pm - love - by lifesux (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, on the airplane, the kid behind me kicked my seat hundreds of times, while the big bald guy next to me farted deadly ones repeatedly. I was on a non-stop 14-hour flight. FML

#7027797
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30669) - you deserved it (2146)

On 12/30/2009 at 1:27am - misc - by planes - United States (Oregon)

Today, the guy I've had a crush on came over to my house. My Dad came in to see how we we're doing, looks at me and says "Man... You've REALLY been puttin' on the pounds!", pokes me in the stomach a few times, and leaves. FML

#6968150
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26021) - you deserved it (3324)

On 12/27/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Fatty (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I backed out of the driveway of our newly built home. Being unfamiliar with the driveway, I ended up getting bogged in the mud and slid halfway down the steep slope of the front yard, trying free myself. I haven't met my neighbours yet. They stood in their front lawns watching me. FML

#6967912
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15938) - you deserved it (3312)

On 12/27/2009 at 1:58am - misc - by jaded_woman (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend told his parents about my bondage fetish. In front of me. FML

#6952293
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14620) - you deserved it (2844)

On 12/26/2009 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I submitted my application to a restaurant as a server. The manager, who is more than 30 years older than me, said he'd be calling me. He later texted me asking for a date instead of giving me a job. FML

#6894646
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24049) - you deserved it (1767)

On 12/23/2009 at 12:03am - work - by Chris (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24996) - you deserved it (6458)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, at work I was playing football with one of my camp kids in the indoor-pool. I saw a co-worker walking by and I decided to hit him with the football. The football slipped out of my hand and I hit a lady in the face, breaking her nose, and causing her to fall and get a concussion. FML

#6725096
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6852) - you deserved it (29708)

On 12/12/2009 at 5:54pm - misc - by Icci (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me because I was "letting myself go". When I told the little girl I babysit in the afternoons why I was so upset, she looked at me for a moment before saying, "Well, I definitely can't blame him." FML

#6716772
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24071) - you deserved it (7290)

On 12/12/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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