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Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I saw a picture of a dude on a Harley on my friend's wall. I asked her if it was Dog the bounty hunter. It wasn't, it was her aunt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13859) - you deserved it (2831)
On 04/23/2012 at 10:12pm - misc - by GogoTheGreat - United States (Texas)
Today, my daughter told me that when she dies, she'd like her ashes spread on her laptop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16398) - you deserved it (2075)
On 04/15/2012 at 11:10pm - kids - by sigh (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (9702) - you deserved it (39880) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France
Today, a guy asked me why I'm single. As a joke, I told him that not only do I have a penis, but that it's so large that most men are intimidated by it. He wasn't impressed. And I actually wonder why I'm single. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7343) - you deserved it (17616)
On 04/13/2012 at 9:11am - intimacy - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I woke up and decided to make my mom a special Easter breakfast in bed. I pre-heated the oven to bake the sausage just the way she likes. Guess where my easter basket was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21424) - you deserved it (4321)
On 04/08/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by jess - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was laying down in bed when my puppy decided to bite my ear. As I started laughing and pulling him off I noticed one of my $200 earrings got pulled off with it. And now I wait. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22398) - you deserved it (4084)
On 03/17/2012 at 10:16am - misc - by lizzie1833 - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had a nasty cough, but I went to college anyway. When I walked into class, I could practically smell menstrual blood in the air. After a few coughs, our instructor gave me an "Oh, shut up!" After half an hour, she kicked me out for not "taking the class seriously". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16262) - you deserved it (5541)
On 03/16/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by danny5191 (man) - United Kingdom (Southampton)
Today, my therapist clapped for me when I told her I'd made a friend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20466) - you deserved it (2447)
On 03/01/2012 at 12:12pm - misc - by ohdang - United States (Illinois)
Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20203) - you deserved it (1496)
On 02/29/2012 at 12:30am - misc - by mandygeegoesnom - United States
Today, my bra burst apart in the middle of class. I then had the privilege of asking my male teacher if I could borrow his stapler to put it back together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20635) - you deserved it (2923)
On 02/13/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by chlolivia (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26026) - you deserved it (1994) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I found out my little sister is marrying my ex, and that my mother set them up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35540) - you deserved it (2521)
On 01/31/2012 at 9:41am - love - by Random (woman) - United States
Today, I switched from pads to tampons. It took me several botched attempts trying insert one before I succeeded, and now I feel like I've just raped myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28526) - you deserved it (10415)
On 01/15/2012 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by lolwut - United States
Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21602) - you deserved it (2772)
On 01/13/2012 at 5:47am - intimacy - by doctorsandnurses (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)
Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe". FML
I agree, your life sucks (23260) - you deserved it (9308)
On 01/07/2012 at 9:12am - misc - by randomgirl - United Kingdom (London)
Friday 24 May 2013
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