About canybean : I read FMLs to fall asleep at night.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, my son told his teacher that she "has a nice rack." He's four. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21589) - you deserved it (8130)
On 12/04/2010 at 1:50am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore
Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8912) - you deserved it (19366)
On 11/26/2010 at 10:43am - misc - by blackitalian - United States
Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same time. I tried to be funny and touched her breast, saying "Boob" in a silly voice. In reply, she slapped me in the crotch, saying "Dick" in the same voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6817) - you deserved it (45232)
On 11/21/2010 at 3:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Morelos)
Today, I bought one of my favorite albums from when I was growing up. When I looked at the liner notes, I learned that my favorite song on the album wasn't about taking a bath, but about going to a brothel. My second-favorite isn't about moving, but about suicide. My childhood just shattered. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16665) - you deserved it (3933)
On 11/17/2010 at 3:08am - intimacy - by nilssonfan (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, b*tch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9844) - you deserved it (44512)
On 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I tripped on a step that said "Watch your step." Two hours later, I hit my head on a sign that said "Mind your head." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21198) - you deserved it (9832)
On 11/13/2010 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my cat learned how to flush the toilet while I was in the shower. His transformation from cute kitten to pure evil entity is now complete. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25220) - you deserved it (4137)
On 11/08/2010 at 5:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)
Today, I went to a party dressed as a Pinata. Drunk people tried to hit me all night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6152) - you deserved it (37818)
On 11/01/2010 at 3:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my son stuck coins in our DVD player. It would be cute if he wasn't 25. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27893) - you deserved it (4062)
On 10/30/2010 at 4:42pm - kids - by idiot - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)
Today, I got pulled over by a state trooper for speeding. When he saw I had something in my pocket, he began to ask if it was a weapon. After arguing for a few minutes I was put in handcuffs. I was too embarrassed to pull the tampon out my pocket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6800) - you deserved it (30573)
On 10/21/2010 at 2:10pm - misc - by Victoria - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was on Skype with a guy I really like, in the living room. My dad saw that I was on video chat, got undressed, right down to his bright green y-fronts, and then started dancing behind me. My crush saw it all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29252) - you deserved it (5184)
On 10/21/2010 at 11:20am - misc - by maddiee. (woman) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)
Today, I discovered my neighbors have bought a karaoke machine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23258) - you deserved it (453)
On 10/18/2010 at 9:09pm - misc - by the_music_major (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I discovered my neighbors have bought a karaoke machine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23258) - you deserved it (453)
On 10/18/2010 at 9:09pm - misc - by the_music_major (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I discovered my neighbors have bought a karaoke machine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23258) - you deserved it (453)
On 10/18/2010 at 9:09pm - misc - by the_music_major (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I discovered my neighbors have bought a karaoke machine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23258) - you deserved it (453)
On 10/18/2010 at 9:09pm - misc - by the_music_major (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Monday 20 May 2013
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