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canybean

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canybean
  • Town/Country : NYC, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 800
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About canybean : I read FMLs to fall asleep at night.

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canybean's favorite FMLs

Today, my car was broken into, and they stole all my CDs, but left my daughter's Black Eyed Peas CD behind. I'm pretty pissed about the theft, but almost glad to see that the delinquents in my town have a decent taste in music. FML

#17444868
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27533) - you deserved it (3768)

On 08/11/2011 at 10:30pm - money - by Musicfan - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, someone had the unique opportunity to be able to say to me, "Excuse me, your pants are on fire." FML

#17270186
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23744) - you deserved it (4628)

On 07/26/2011 at 5:22pm - health - by smokin (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, yep, pubic hair is still flammable. FML

#17253046
364 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11802) - you deserved it (55289)

On 07/25/2011 at 11:12am - health - by Smokey9 - United States (Florida)

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

#17207993
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42544) - you deserved it (4545)

On 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm - money - by iwantmoney - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML

#17115448
467 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52783) - you deserved it (9114)

On 07/15/2011 at 12:24am - animals - by flipnazn - United States (Texas)

Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML

#17109395
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18194) - you deserved it (44710)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm - work - by sbutler (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML

#17109395
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18194) - you deserved it (44710)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm - work - by sbutler (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

#17044811
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34952) - you deserved it (4836)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm - money - by Lame (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML

#16993109
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28633) - you deserved it (2740)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:54pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML

#16943359
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30567) - you deserved it (2965)

On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML

#16936128
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31303) - you deserved it (4492)

On 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm - kids - by parenting sucks - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

#16879378
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58160) - you deserved it (7218)

On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to explain to my little brother that my tampons weren't ear plugs. FML

#16642737
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30957) - you deserved it (4020)

On 06/13/2011 at 10:24am - kids - by Evaki1 - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I was at the park with my daughter. She walked up to a boy at the swings, held her hand out, and said, "Hi I'm Vanessa, and someday you'll be working for me." FML

#16591956
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29475) - you deserved it (11636)

On 06/10/2011 at 5:57am - kids - by Rachel (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML

#16589228
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46326) - you deserved it (7240)

On 06/10/2011 at 1:01am - work - by MakeMeASandwich (man) - United States (Illinois)



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