calivianya

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calivianya

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 4 April 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2987
  • Number of comments : 136
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 31 posted

About calivianya : 24, student, finally employed! I still have a lot of free time.

calivianya's page activity

Visits<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 12:50pm<b>itsuniversal</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 8:17pm<b>dontmindme7</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 2:34am<b>mdizzle4rizzle</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 2:18pm<b>FifaSkiller</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 11:20pm<b>DaveCorgan</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 4:52pm<b>noodlemantra</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 5:05am<b>evanvoss</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 4:07pm<b>wheresmymary</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 6:38pm<b>Swarley4</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 3:12am<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 2:22am<b>h3llsbells</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 4:14am<b>michu</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 11:30am<b>maydayyparade</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 12:24pm<b>PrincessKenny</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 4:41pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 10:50pm<b>jelrid</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 10:10pm<b>arich6210</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 2:09pm

Fucked!<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 8:22am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 12:56pm<b>jelrid</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 4:10am<b>rhiley</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 7:54pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 3:57pm<b>mr_mac81</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:03pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 4:51am

calivianya's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

See all of calivianya's badges

calivianya's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that as adorable as it might be to watch your cat follow your cursor around the screen, the humor ends when she dives into and breaks the monitor. FML

by MouseChaser / 11/26/2009 at 4:22am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my daughter was feeling sick. She threw up on the floor. As I was cleaning up her vomit, she threw up on my head. Twice. FML

by laurwitharawr / 10/06/2009 at 8:08am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

by P0wned / 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm / France (Bretagne) / Love

Today, I urgently needed to use the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. When I went to flush, it would not go down the pipes. After about ten panic filled minutes, I notice the cat litter box. I carefully scoop out my logs, and bury them in the cat litter. FML

by Poowee / 09/18/2009 at 12:29am / United States (Alabama) / Animals

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

by awilson / 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the way to meet him. While chatting, I told him that I had a rip in my favorite jeans. When he sympathetically apologized, I said "It's okay, you're just going to take them off in a minute, anyway." I forgot my mom was in the car. FML

by leahbeuhh / 09/05/2009 at 9:39am / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Love

Today, while giving a lecture about gases to a large chemistry class, I went outside to let loose an unusualy loud fart while they took some notes. I came back in only to see 300 students dying of laughter. I had left the wireless mic on. FML

by DrGas / 09/04/2009 at 12:30am / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

by NotThatKind / 08/24/2009 at 12:28am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that the medicated eye drops I have been taking to fight a mild eye infection show up under black lights when I walked into a party and the whole left side of my face was glowing. FML

by SummerGirl0009 / 08/23/2009 at 6:24pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was told I have bipolar disorder. I'm 31. It took so long to diagnose because my mom always figured I was "just a super bitch half the time." FML

by crazychick / 08/19/2009 at 12:40pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I took my daughter to the lake. She told me she had to go to the bathroom and I whispered to her "just pee in the lake, it's fine, but go in a little deeper." She went in the lake and turned to me to yell "MOM, IS THIS DEEP ENOUGH FOR ME TO PEE?" FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2009 at 3:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, at the bank, I went to get some coffee from their machine. I gave it my money and pressed the buttons but nothing was happening. After banging on the machine for ten minutes and calling a teller over, a little boy reached up on his tippy toes to press the giant green START button for me. FML

by Tygastyle / 06/23/2009 at 1:37pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was helping some mental health patients at work, I spent 20 mins to fail to connect the DVD player to the TV and went back to make them something to eat. I came back into the room after 5 mins and one of the patients had connected it for himself. He has a profound learning disability. FML

by Tom_why / 05/23/2009 at 3:27pm / United Kingdom (North East Lincolnshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

by sucks / 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals