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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Mobility
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Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I had been trying to text my girlfriend all day, but no reply. After a while, I became worried so I called. She picked up and said, "Can't talk, busy." Not even a minute later, my best friend says to me, "Dude, tell your girlfriend to leave me alone. She's been texting me all day." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36131) - you deserved it (2377)
On 12/19/2012 at 6:31pm - misc - by SugarMyBalls (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I had to break up with my boyfriend when I caught him installing cameras in my bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34417) - you deserved it (3867)
On 12/17/2012 at 7:25am - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my daughter had the words "Always classy, never trashy" tattooed across her lower back in crappy cursive lettering. She doesn't understand the irony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23653) - you deserved it (2138)
On 12/15/2012 at 3:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. I went slowly to build up the excitement, and I thought it was working really well, until he sighed, "For fuck's sake, it's a dick, not a shotgun." and told me to stop embarrassing him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26651) - you deserved it (7175)
On 12/14/2012 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by sucks at sucking (woman) - United Kingdom (Bournemouth)
Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. I went slowly to build up the excitement, and I thought it was working really well, until he sighed, "For fuck's sake, it's a dick, not a shotgun." and told me to stop embarrassing him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26651) - you deserved it (7175)
On 12/14/2012 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by sucks at sucking (woman) - United Kingdom (Bournemouth)
Today, I played a game of Monopoly with my friends. Since I'm of Greek origin, they thought it would be funny to make me start with a €100,000 debt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20676) - you deserved it (3709) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm - money - by Money-money-money (woman) - France
Today, my dog died and I told my grandfather I wanted her to be cremated. I came home later to find him burning her in our barbecue pit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25214) - you deserved it (2571)
On 12/06/2012 at 2:18am - animals - by psd60 - United States (Texas)
Today, I had a presentation in French class. I was so nervous, the first thing I said when I got up there was, "Hola." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17507) - you deserved it (3164)
On 12/06/2012 at 12:35am - work - by SpanishInFrenchClass (woman) - United States
Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11092) - you deserved it (36048)
Today, at a talent show, my band got booed before we even started playing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14748) - you deserved it (1817)
On 12/02/2012 at 9:26pm - misc - by disembob - United Kingdom
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when the condom broke. He told me to go put a tampon in to "soak up the kids". How did he graduate? FML
I agree, your life sucks (30624) - you deserved it (4317)
On 12/01/2012 at 9:54am - intimacy - by me. - United States
Today, my girlfriend accused me of cheating, because I tipped our waitress at dinner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21048) - you deserved it (1926)
On 12/01/2012 at 12:59am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was blessed with a girlfriend who loves giving blowjobs. And cursed with a girlfriend who is also somehow really bad at them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21624) - you deserved it (5431)
On 11/22/2012 at 8:19pm - intimacy - by Janitoro (man) - United States
Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17472) - you deserved it (1019)
On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I ran into my boss outside of work. She smiled, and started trying to have an in-depth chat with me. I wouldn't have minded, if it weren't for the fact I ran into her at a club, whilst they were having an S and M theme night. And we were both fully dressed up for it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14732) - you deserved it (3265)
On 11/21/2012 at 3:43pm - work - by jobsearching (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)
Monday 17 June 2013
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