Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

bwinski

Offline (24 hours ago) | Search for a member

bwinski

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 February 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7218
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

bwinski's page activity

Visits<b>nothemother</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 10:14am<b>teresa96706</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 5:31am<b>anormalperson</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 4:07pm<b>NoirChartreux</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:59am<b>iclubfrodo</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 11:51am<b>HeyHeyFishFillet</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 3:41am<b>chilltime</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 10:26pm<b>TotallyNotABush</b> - the 07/23/2011 at 5:29am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:02am<b>Firesprite2009</b> - the 12/21/2009 at 9:01pm

bwinski's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of bwinski's badges

bwinski's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend told me how she loves when I kiss her out of the blue. I don't have the heart to admit I only do it so I can get some peace and quiet for a few seconds. FML

#16429286
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17638) - you deserved it (35691)

On 05/31/2011 at 12:51am - love - by romantic84 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML

#16410366
408 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16740) - you deserved it (77328)

On 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm - intimacy - by yummy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I came home from work, only to find the babysitter passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's. At some point, it seems my son had taken the liberty of peeing on her while she slept. FML

#16375821
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38105) - you deserved it (5741)

On 05/27/2011 at 6:09pm - kids - by diddlebuag - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend told me I looked pretty. I said, "Aww, that's the first time you've said that to me." He replied, "Well, it's the first time you've looked pretty." FML

#16341966
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48879) - you deserved it (9202)

On 05/25/2011 at 12:06pm - love - by Username - United States (California)

Today, I was at Walmart with my mom, when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML

#16237035
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42473) - you deserved it (3539)

On 05/18/2011 at 12:08pm - misc - by nicknick2 (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I dropped my hair straightener. The good news is I caught it. The bad news is I caught it by the iron itself. FML

#16104533
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31416) - you deserved it (6786)

On 05/09/2011 at 1:15pm - misc - by moron - United Kingdom

Today, my football coach thought it would be a good idea to get drunk, run to the other sideline, and scream, "WELCOME TO SPARTA, BITCH!" This would've been funny if he weren't also my dad. FML

#15960632
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35088) - you deserved it (3736)

On 04/28/2011 at 6:28am - misc - by spartanson -

Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML

#15947062
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13433) - you deserved it (39708)

On 04/27/2011 at 9:35am - kids - by BadgerSpirit (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

#15627116
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47043) - you deserved it (13931)

On 04/03/2011 at 9:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my friend stole my phone to call the creepy boy that follows me around at school. I wouldn't have been so bothered if she hadn't had phone sex with him, all while pretending to be me. He got so into it, he now thinks we're a couple. FML

#15514869
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46019) - you deserved it (5764)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by Username - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my neighbors got a rooster. FML

#15427360
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58123) - you deserved it (6302)

On 03/22/2011 at 3:23am - animals - by negin -

Today, while at a school anti-drugs assembly, the speaker asked everyone to stand up if they knew someone who had died of an overdose. As I stood up, my friend hit me in the side, making me laugh. I stood frozen under accusing glares while the speaker bitched me out for a good 5 minutes. FML

#15323046
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29200) - you deserved it (11644)

On 03/15/2011 at 3:29pm - misc - by Embarassed (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML

#15105515
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16361) - you deserved it (47856)

On 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by verasam01 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was sitting in social studies and someone threw a note at me. It said "Go fuck yourself, everyone hates you, just die." FML

#15001242
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47514) - you deserved it (4763)

On 02/16/2011 at 10:30am - misc - by oheyimsarahh - United States

Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML

#14974014
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30805) - you deserved it (11457)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:51pm - kids - by Mikabe (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: