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bwinski

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bwinski

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  • Number of visits : 6231
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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bwinski's page activity

Visits<b>anormalperson</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 4:07pm<b>NoirChartreux</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:59am<b>iclubfrodo</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 11:51am<b>HeyHeyFishFillet</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 3:41am<b>chilltime</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 10:26pm<b>TotallyNotABush</b> - the 07/23/2011 at 5:29am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:02am<b>Firesprite2009</b> - the 12/21/2009 at 9:01pm

bwinski's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of bwinski's badges

bwinski's favorite FMLs

Today, the bar owner I work for told us to pay better attention to our drunk patrons, and to start cutting them off. A fellow bar maid asked how we are supposed to tell when it's time. He pointed at me and said, "When they start hitting on her, they're too drunk to drive." FML

#20141378
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26894) - you deserved it (1903)

On 10/31/2012 at 7:30am - work - by kat (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

#20141194
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32720) - you deserved it (3585)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to the hospital in labor expecting a baby boy. I ended the day with identical twins, a baffled doctor, and a husband convinced that our sons can clone themselves. FML

#20139353
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27119) - you deserved it (2507)

On 10/29/2012 at 9:30pm - kids - by CutestBoysEver (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while in a pharmacy, I walked over to the shaving cream aisle. I picked up a can to smell it and unknowingly pushed the button, spraying an old guy in front of me. He freaked out and started telling everyone that the ceiling above him was leaking. FML

#20139053
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9378) - you deserved it (14465)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:39pm - misc - by IndianAngel96 - United States (Texas)

Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend what she got me for my half birthday, to which she replied "A baby." She was serious. FML

Today, at work as an EMT, I was telling a panicked patient that I would be taking her vital signs. I inadvertently said that I would be taking her vital organs. FML

#20137874
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18577) - you deserved it (3615)

On 10/28/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by Medic - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband and I were told by our elderly neighbors that they can hear us having sex a lot. To top it off, the elderly man said while patting his wife's arm with a smile, "Carol used to make noises like that too, back in the day." FML

#20136326
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29861) - you deserved it (6464)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by Ceej - United States (Michigan)

Today, I saw a folder on my son's PC named "PussyPictures". I sat him down for a talk, only to be told they contained pictures of the James Bond character Pussy Galore, for his essay about sexism in movies. He's now mocking me for "having a dirty mind". FML

#20135671
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9696) - you deserved it (34410)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:28pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, a parent was too busy texting to notice her child had run in front of a moving truck. She did however see me grab the child's backpack to yank him back out of traffic. She then screamed at me for "manhandling" her child and demanded I be fired. It's not even my school; I'm a part time sub. FML

#20129237
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28938) - you deserved it (1342)

On 10/22/2012 at 11:51pm - work - by bad samaritan (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML

#20128340
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27941) - you deserved it (4995)

On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29858) - you deserved it (4530)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after waking up from a drunken night, I realized the burning sensation I had from the lube during sex was because I used hand sanitizer. FML

#20125076
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10991) - you deserved it (35138)

On 10/20/2012 at 9:57am - intimacy - by MIND BLOWING - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad saw on TV that in some parts of Africa, it's not uncommon for people to attach make-shift flamethrowers to their cars to defend against carjackers. He's now lost his mind and is forcing me to help him put one together to scare off Jehovah's Witnesses. FML

#20124199
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17852) - you deserved it (2007)

On 10/19/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Watchtower? More like fortress. (man) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I told my daughter that she won't be going to her homecoming dance as punishment for her terrible grades. She's been crying and singing "If I Die Young" in her room for hours. At this point, I don't know if I need to call a therapist or a vocal coach. FML

#20117570
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25864) - you deserved it (9169)

On 10/15/2012 at 12:07am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, after weeks of coming home to find my furniture all tipped over, thinking the place was haunted, and accepting my boyfriend's offers to come over and "comfort" me, I came home from work early. I found my boyfriend in the kitchen, kicking over all the chairs. FML

#20116490
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18838) - you deserved it (7784)

On 10/14/2012 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Estonia



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