About buddy51 : Everything I know about life, I learned from FML!
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Today, I was walking down the strip with a friend when we saw a homeless man with no arm. I felt bad, so I gave him some cash and I looked into his poor little eyes when he put out his arm for a hug. Without thinking, I hugged him. Right as I was thinking, "wtf am I doing," he kissed my boob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14008) - you deserved it (44147)
On 07/25/2009 at 1:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, my boyfriend said he couldn't come to my grandfathers funeral because he was at his cottage and couldn't make it. Later that day, when driving home from the graveyard I saw him walking down the street, with another girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43796) - you deserved it (2072)
On 07/24/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by Lyingboyfriend (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to a funeral. When I got there, I hugged one of the family members and he asked, "How are you?" Out of habit, I replied, "Good, how about you?" He looked appalled and shouted "How the fuck do you think I am?! My mother just died!" loud enough for everyone to hear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32912) - you deserved it (13874)
On 07/23/2009 at 12:40am - misc - by partycats (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I got very dressed up and was excited for my uncle's wedding. While standing in line for photos, I heard my dad's voice from behind me say "Who's the hot chick in the brown dress?" My uncle responds "Uh, that's your daughter." Silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61103) - you deserved it (3615)
On 07/23/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by Rory (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my manager came in and said "Hey Alice, great job closing so well last night. NOT." and walked off. When I heard the door shut, I said "And great job being a bitch, you cow." I heard my manager walking back towards me. She wasn't the one who left the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14419) - you deserved it (37342)
On 07/22/2009 at 12:03am - work - by Alice (woman) - United States
Today, I was driving and saw two hot girls on the sidewalk so I rolled down the window to whistle at them. However, I failed to notice that the car in front of me had stopped at a red light. I rear ended the car, the girls ran away laughing their asses off, and now I have to pay for the damage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5467) - you deserved it (77915)
On 07/21/2009 at 12:14am - love - by embarrassed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I woke up feeling a tingling sensation on my testicles. I enjoyed it for a few seconds, then threw off the covers. Looks like there have been cockroaches in my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46245) - you deserved it (8553)
On 07/18/2009 at 6:48am - misc - by fartypeepee (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my long-distance boyfriend came to visit. We went to a cafe where I managed to lock myself in the toilet, breaking the key. I then had to wait for them to break down the door. I came out to applause from everyone, who had been laughing at me for 25 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27510) - you deserved it (3491)
On 07/15/2009 at 10:29am - misc - by FML (woman) - Syrian Arab Republic (Dimashq)
Today, I was in the gas station and I saw this creepy lady staring at me and smiling. She just didn't stop. I even gave an awkward wave to let her know that I saw her staring at me. Finally I decided to confront the woman, turns out the overly happy woman was a cardboard cut out FML
I agree, your life sucks (10393) - you deserved it (55108)
On 07/15/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I went on a date, and everything was going fine- until the ride home. On the way, I starting having progressively bad stomach pains. Once she left the car, I passed the worst gas that I had ever encountered. As I began to drive, she knocked on the window. She forgot her purse in the car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33988) - you deserved it (3841)
On 07/11/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was working at the library. Some punks thought it would be funny to shit in a book, close it and return it in the drop box. The fact that it was sitting outside in the ninety degree heat for a couple hours did not help the stench; it was everywhere and I had to clean the mess. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48162) - you deserved it (2116)
On 07/02/2009 at 8:18pm - work - by alwaysxgettingxshitxon (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I met with a friend who had gained some weight since I saw him last. After a friendly hug, I put my hand on his new man boob and, without thinking, left it there way too long. I realized that I was groping him and, in a panic, did the only thing I could think of. I patted it. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12245) - you deserved it (37567)
On 06/30/2009 at 6:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I took chocolax to help lose some weight before I left for Miami. Turns out it doesn't happen right away like in the movies, it happens six hours later in front of your girlfriends parents, that you've just met for the first time at a very upperclass restaurant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9607) - you deserved it (38454)
On 06/30/2009 at 1:14am - health - by POLYBLOT (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I called my Dad to wish him happy birthday. The phone was disconnected, so I called my sister to see what his cell was. She then informed me that our Dad was in jail for selling shrooms to teenagers at a music festival out of state. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44141) - you deserved it (2493)
On 06/29/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by shroomda (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was testing for figure skating. I was wearing a brand new custom dress that was a halter top. On my first move, I tripped and fell flat on my face. Immediately after retaking the move, my dress snapped open, exposing myself to the judges. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38285) - you deserved it (3671)
On 06/28/2009 at 7:09pm - misc - by sk8rgurl (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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