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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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buckeyefan16

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buckeyefan16
  • Town/Country : U.S.A
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 January 1940 (72 years)
  • Number of visits : 3111
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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buckeyefan16's favorite FMLs

Today, I was jamming out in my car, tapping my fingers on the wheel and bobbing my head. At the next stoplight, I happened to look over and the passenger of the car next to me was holding a sign in the window saying, "I bet you don't have a boyfriend, do you?" FML

#16977432 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (22077) - you deserved it (4024)

On 07/04/2011 at 8:25pm - misc - by brittbrat4 - United States

Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML

#16009360 (244)

I agree, your life sucks (11090) - you deserved it (30875)

On 05/01/2011 at 8:21pm - animals - by Cassie -

Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blow job from me. FML

#15733743 (230)

I agree, your life sucks (31359) - you deserved it (6709)

On 04/11/2011 at 12:01am - intimacy - by blower - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to the doctor thinking I had breast cancer. Turns out, I have a third boob. FML

#15057968 (239)

I agree, your life sucks (33454) - you deserved it (3258)

On 02/20/2011 at 10:28pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, while sitting on the couch, my boyfriend came over, pulled his penis out of his fly, and started stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. FML

#14990668 (315)

I agree, your life sucks (37075) - you deserved it (9938)

On 02/15/2011 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

#14794923 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (27760) - you deserved it (3597)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After about minutes of freaking out and explaining on how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was best thus far. FML

#13787466 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (35739) - you deserved it (12164)

On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I lost my virginity. I also found out that if I have a powerful enough orgasm, I am launched into a lengthy and uncontrollable sneezing fit. FML

#13737097 (179)

I agree, your life sucks (21925) - you deserved it (2654)

On 11/06/2010 at 10:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was waiting to take a dump in a gas station restroom. A 300 pound man walked out, shook his head, and said "I'm sorry" to me. FML

#13675906 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (24480) - you deserved it (2188)

On 11/01/2010 at 3:39pm - misc - by mr_p - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. Shes on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

#13661699 (403)

I agree, your life sucks (48551) - you deserved it (6290)

On 10/31/2010 at 9:30am - intimacy - by Tai - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend, who is a great cook, decided to try his hand at baking. The cookies he made looked weird but tasted good. I jokingly said, "They taste great, but they look awful!" He responded by saying, "I could say the same thing about you." FML

#13655467 (101)

I agree, your life sucks (128) - you deserved it (15224)

On 10/30/2010 at 10:14pm - love - by yummy(: - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was sucking on a Tic Tac. Just as I was starting to get into it, the Tic-Tac suddenly shot down my throat. After a minute of coughing and gagging, it came back up... out my left nostril. FML

#13652209 (201)

I agree, your life sucks (24415) - you deserved it (3847)

On 10/30/2010 at 5:28pm - health - by DeepTaccer (man) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML

#13572879 (265)

I agree, your life sucks (9552) - you deserved it (29604)

On 10/24/2010 at 3:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was disciplining one of my students for behavior, and he started to roll his eyes every time I was trying to teach the lesson. So I threatened to write him up. After looking closely at the student, I realized he has a lazy roaming eye. FML

#13555511 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (5667) - you deserved it (20600)

On 10/22/2010 at 10:15pm - work - by qhu - United States (Florida)

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

#13432324 (343)

I agree, your life sucks (26950) - you deserved it (15289)

On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)