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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was eating with my boyfriend and his family at a high-end restaurant when, suddenly, I screamed, thinking a dog had just bitten my leg. I am terrified of dogs. I kicked my under-the-table assailant as hard as I could. It was my boyfriend's adorable five-year-old sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59241) - you deserved it (28392)
On 03/22/2009 at 9:02pm - kids - by Noca (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my mother and I walked past my boyfriend, whom she's never met. After we casually greeted each other and went on our way my mother says, "He's cute. Who is he?" I paused for a second and replied, "That's my boyfriend." She then asks, "Does he know that?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (54332) - you deserved it (10222)
On 03/22/2009 at 3:45pm - love - by ThanksMa (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I suggested that my mother download Skype so we could video chat while I'm studying in London over the summer. After I had explained how it worked and that it was free, she said "Well...you'll only be gone for a few months. It's not really worth it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (54333) - you deserved it (3272)
On 03/22/2009 at 1:45am - kids - by unlovedd (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my little 7 year old brother asked me what horny meant whilst in the car with my parents. When I wouldn't tell him what it meant he screamed, "I'm getting horny!" at the top of his lungs, and told my parents that I told him to say it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54036) - you deserved it (5237)
On 03/21/2009 at 11:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my husband of 9 years announced he was gay. He insinuated that he was only able to achieve erections because I looked like a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (322265) - you deserved it (28019)
On 03/21/2009 at 3:15am - intimacy - by jilted (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43128) - you deserved it (492341)
On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my town had a carnival to raise money for cancer. I ran a kissing booth, when a really cute guy came up paid his $20, looked at me, and said "not even for cancer." He took his money and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71494) - you deserved it (5691)
On 03/20/2009 at 10:39pm - love - by cancerfreak (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (314050) - you deserved it (41269)
On 03/20/2009 at 12:15am - kids - by ScoobieDoo (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my parents said that they bought me a car. I had been begging for one for a year and they always said that I would have to pay for it myself. I got really excited and went to the garage to see my new ride. It was a Hot Wheels car with a note saying "save your money". FML
I agree, your life sucks (57092) - you deserved it (26117)
On 03/17/2009 at 2:17pm - money - by RdL (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (445709) - you deserved it (72675)
On 03/16/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by gentileman (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I went to a party and the cops came to bust the party. I jumped out the window of a second story house in order to avoid getting arrested. I broke my leg in three places and got a concussion. The cops let everyone go with a warning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32963) - you deserved it (142434)
On 03/16/2009 at 12:02pm - misc - by natty (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was walking down the street and noticed a man in ripped clothes with a cup out asking for money. I was on my way to the movies but I felt like this man needed it more that me. Right as I gave it to him, he pulled out his blackberry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53633) - you deserved it (15118)
On 03/14/2009 at 4:55pm - money - by california (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I decided it would be pretty amusing to press the "Like" button on everyone's status on Facebook without reading them just to get on peoples' nerves. After re-reading them later, I found out one of them said "I MISS YOU SOO MUCH GRANDMOM. RIP". I liked that her grandmother died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14955) - you deserved it (146917)
On 03/14/2009 at 1:50am - misc - by like - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I got a $200 ticket mailed to me for drunk driving in Maryland. I have never been pulled over for drunk driving and I have never been to Maryland. FML
I agree, your life sucks (78611) - you deserved it (2854)
On 03/12/2009 at 8:38pm - money - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, the cute boy in my biology class I had been crushing on invited me over to study for a huge test. Once I got to his house, I really had to use the bathroom. I ended ending up taking a huge dump and clogging up his toilet. He had to come plunge it for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63047) - you deserved it (19457)
On 03/10/2009 at 4:42pm - love - by musicaddict (woman) - United States (Texas)
Monday 17 June 2013
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