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brunogtz

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brunogtz

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1243
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About brunogtz : hey, i'm an ear

brunogtz's page activity

Visits<b>xMrsCarlilex</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 9:50am<b>its_jonny_bro</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 9:40pm<b>odod777</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 4:12pm<b>jalenlounis</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 6:05am<b>AndrewWeschke</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 10:47pm<b>Skylae</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 7:43am<b>alfalfalaffa</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 6:06pm<b>fixingme99</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 4:52pm<b>sCrEaMiNgToAsT</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 5:54am<b>Zombielanddd</b> - the 03/09/2013 at 12:44am<b>rosenkrieger223</b> - the 01/19/2013 at 12:19am<b>mbomb</b> - the 01/26/2012 at 5:23am<b>japcracker08</b> - the 12/01/2011 at 7:13pm<b>Cath1_1</b> - the 10/29/2011 at 12:36pm<b>Mikko8</b> - the 10/21/2011 at 2:49pm<b>forestsunshine</b> - the 10/15/2011 at 10:31pm<b>sweettpie129</b> - the 10/10/2011 at 2:03pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 10/10/2011 at 12:30am

brunogtz's FML badges

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It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of brunogtz's badges

brunogtz's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML

#19641486
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20907) - you deserved it (4674)

On 05/18/2012 at 11:05am - love - by Great. (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML

#19615151
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7918) - you deserved it (41125)

On 05/13/2012 at 2:26am - work - by fired - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to excuse myself from the classroom so I could have a quick wank. This was because I somehow got extremely horny during a lesson on frog reproduction. FML

#19598772
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11142) - you deserved it (36412)

On 05/09/2012 at 6:19pm - intimacy - by polimeros (man) - Mexico (Queretaro de Arteaga)

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13156) - you deserved it (41360)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

#19561833
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14216) - you deserved it (51274) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, while at work as a cashier, I tried to be sweet and ID an elderly man buying a bottle of wine. He responded by calling me a "blind-ass bitch" and calling my manager for "harassing" him. FML

#19552160
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12421) - you deserved it (24499)

On 04/30/2012 at 5:24am - work - by zomg - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

#19548071
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25045) - you deserved it (2513)

On 04/29/2012 at 2:31pm - love - by davincourt (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I told the hairdresser that my kid had cut my hair. I don't have kids. I was just really drunk. FML

#19545053
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6384) - you deserved it (27795)

On 04/28/2012 at 11:06pm - misc - by faux ma (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote: "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML

#19517748
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13505) - you deserved it (48456)

On 04/23/2012 at 6:06pm - misc - by pathetic (man) - Poland (Mazowieckie)

Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML

#19477663
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24636) - you deserved it (2928)

On 04/16/2012 at 8:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

#19475030
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19181) - you deserved it (36730)

On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
582 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13340) - you deserved it (54582) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I had to pick my 22-year-old son up from the hospital, after he got blind drunk, got his hand stuck in a Pringles can, and got the bright idea of staggering to the local ER to get it cut off. FML

#19438168
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22387) - you deserved it (2523)

On 04/09/2012 at 6:32pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40172) - you deserved it (12380)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML

#19263580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34856) - you deserved it (5451)

On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)



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