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brooke_chook's favorite FMLs
by SydIsPrettyCool / 08/04/2011 at 1:44am / United States (Michigan) / Animals
by chinchilla4404 / 08/02/2011 at 10:17am / United States / Health
by missmirror / 05/02/2011 at 7:00pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/07/2011 at 3:11am / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Animals
by human torch / 03/18/2010 at 11:22am / United States / Health
Today, I came down with sudden diarrhea while at taekwondo practice. I discreetly called my dad for a pickup, but on our way out, he told my instructor that I had to go because I was "shitting my pants with fear". He did this in front of all my classmates. FML
by GoDiarrhea / 03/04/2010 at 1:52pm / Argentina (Distrito Federal) / Health
Today, I was about to take a crap when the smoke alarm went off. I ran out of the bathroom and tried to run downstairs. I tripped and shit on myself. The alarm had gone off cause my kid put my wallet in the toaster. FML
by Lance / 01/28/2010 at 3:25pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a very important test. Last night, I'd had such bad leg pains that I couldn't sleep, so I took two very strong painkillers and went to sleep pain-free. I apparently accidentally overdosed, because when I woke up, I couldn't see properly or even stand up. And I missed my test. FML
by fuuuuck / 01/27/2010 at 7:27pm / Canada (Alberta) / Health
by volleyballgirl12 / 01/17/2010 at 1:31am / Love
Today, I was at Target buying four coloring books. As I was in line, the woman behind me said that buying coloring books was a good idea to keep my kids occupied. I smiled and said that it would give me a few minutes to relax. I am a 26 year old guy with no kids. The coloring books were for me. FML
by 2old4thiscrap / 12/08/2009 at 1:06pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by Anonymous / 11/26/2009 at 2:11pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 10/01/2009 at 1:56am / Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/09/2009 at 12:22am / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, I was at my job at an old folks home, and I was cleaning off a table when one old lady looks up at me and says "I've been a dirty dirty girl" in a seductive tone, I thought she meant about the table so I said "yes you have" then she winked at me, I walked away fast. FML
by Anonymous / 06/12/2009 at 3:53am / Canada (Alberta) / Work
- Today, I lost my virginity. Afterwards, he told me that he was only doing this because he wanted to… Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been in love with for the past two years. Five minutes… Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. Halfway through he asked me what day it was. I told him,…