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bribubbles's favorite FMLs
by Bestfrienduncool / 09/30/2010 at 1:11am / Miscellaneous
by YouAREthefather / 03/18/2010 at 12:48pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, I had an interview for a college. The college is in Rhode Island. I live on the West coast. When I asked the interviewer if they got to the mainland by boat or by some other form of transportation, he told me Rhode Island is not an island. FML
by Anonymous / 02/16/2010 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, my grandpa, a married high school teacher, got arrested for having an inappropriate relationship with a female student. Hearing the news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is he most likely going to jail, but in seven months I will have a new aunt who is eighteen years younger than me. FML
by newniece / 01/26/2010 at 7:09pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by jalapeno_popper / 01/21/2010 at 3:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by handlin / 01/14/2010 at 1:45am / Mexico (Nuevo Leon) / Love
Today, my entire extended family was over for Christmas. I opened a gift to see that it was a fruitcake and saw everyone looking at me, smiling. This is their way to tell me that they know I'm gay and that they accept me. I'm straight. FML
by notgay / 12/25/2009 at 2:34pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by sucks_brah / 12/25/2009 at 2:25am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was talking to my aunt about my brother's recent arrest for drug possession. I proudly told her that I have never done drugs of any kind. Her response: "Well, actually you were born addicted to heroin, so you had a drug problem long before your brother." FML
by drugbaby / 12/18/2009 at 2:23pm / United States (Connecticut) / Health
Today, I went to my cousin's farm with my family. First I was pooped on by a goose, peed on by a puppy, bit in the face by the mother dog, fell through the floor of the barn loft, and without knowing it was electric, rested my hand on the horse fence. FML
by Anonymous / 09/28/2009 at 4:36pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals
Today, a very good friend of mine said he had a question to ask me. Jokingly, I threw my arms around his neck and said, "Oh yes, yes, a thousand times yes!" When I sat back down, I saw tears in his eyes, and he said, "You've made me the happiest man alive" as he pulled a small box out of his coat. FML
by dundundadumb / 08/06/2009 at 5:25pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I walked into my new maths class. I stepped inside only to be yelled at by the teacher for nearly 15 minutes. I was then told never to enter her class again and was sent to the principal. My identical twin brother was in her class the period before me. He also has a thing for older women. FML
by slamo / 08/06/2009 at 6:10am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I finally got my yearbook for senior year in high school. I started what everyone does, which is count how many times I appear in the yearbook. I stopped when I found a prominent photo of me, picking my nose in class. FML
by Anonymous / 06/28/2009 at 1:30pm / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous
Today, was my high school's senior awards ceremony. Over 400 people were crammed in the hot auditorium. I won five awards and each time I was called up the laughter grew louder. Apparently even the back row could see my pit stains. FML
by asdf / 06/20/2009 at 1:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Slash / 06/16/2009 at 12:43pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
- Today, my boyfriend and I had amazing make-up sex after a huge fight. Turns out he forgot to let me… Today, I dropped my phone between my legs and tried to catch it with my thighs. Instead, the phone… Today, I married a wonderful man. Even though both of us were no longer virgins, we decided to wait…