brewmasterg

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brewmasterg

18Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 30 December 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 15016
  • Number of comments : 164
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About brewmasterg : www.atlastheaussie.tumblr.com
www.facebook.com/atlasaussie

brewmasterg's page activity

Visits<b>superwhovian</b> - yesterday at 9:28pm<b>Lepisma</b> - yesterday at 8:10pm<b>emeraldkat</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 12:16am<b>angrykid11</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 5:12pm<b>Draysor</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 2:44am<b>Rababco</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 5:07pm<b>atlien247</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 2:39pm<b>cakester123</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 1:38pm<b>VictoriaT519</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 7:09pm<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 4:15pm<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 7:32am<b>phantomxbg</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 11:30pm<b>ssnow</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 8:43am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 11:07pm<b>Lolipop2241030</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 10:07pm<b>Willman757</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 7:50pm<b>assassin29876</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 11:12pm<b>waleedma</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 3:24pm

Fucked!<b>ssnow</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 2:43pm<b>infantrysoldier</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 7:32pm<b>cuculagirl</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 6:04pm<b>apcsox</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 9:06pm<b>chuchusheep</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 4:34pm<b>crazy_loner</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 3:05pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 1:00pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 7:30pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 9:26am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 7:47am<b>EmsyyyRose13</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 8:55pm<b>a_nice_guy</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 2:52pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 6:39pm<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 7:18am<b>Tarlachia</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 10:29pm<b>S232Flash</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 6:31pm<b>Hamlet1971</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 3:07pm<b>ViperSe</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 7:30am

brewmasterg's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of brewmasterg's badges

brewmasterg's favorite FMLs

Today, this beautiful girl that I've known for a long time told me that she just can't date me anymore because I remind her too much of her cat. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2016 at 10:14am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I visited my boyfriend's uncle's house for a party. His 8 year old cousin started asking if I like penis, so my reaction was to laugh, spitting my drink on her and her new dress. She can't pronounce peanuts, and I can't visit anymore. FML

by me / 01/02/2016 at 3:25am / United States (Louisiana) / Kids

Today, after dating this girl for 3 months, I finally introduced her to my friends. She looked panicked during the date, and after it she broke up with me. When I asked why, she told me she could try to deal with a black friend, but not with a gay one. I've been dating a moron all this time. FML

by Alien / 12/29/2015 at 6:07am / Switzerland / Love

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate for the first time when she noticed I only have one testicle. She immediately broke up with me, for she doesn't want her future sons to be gay because they'll only have half of their testosterone. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2015 at 11:46pm / United States (Iowa) / Intimacy

Today, I had a dream where I was having the best sex of my life. With Donald Trump. My boyfriend hasn't stopped laughing. FML

by whatthefuck / 12/27/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, as I passed a printout over my shoulder to my mum, I managed to give myself a papercut on my tear duct. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2015 at 12:11pm / Germany / Health

Today, I wanted my boyfriend to meet my parents. My mum introduced herself as, "I'm Petra. I'm completely normal." FML

by AustrianCow / 12/22/2015 at 4:45pm / Austria (Oberosterreich) / Love

Today, my wife knelt down in front me to give me a blowjob. As she took my underwear off a moth flew out of them. I've got no idea how it got there but I was cock-blocked by a moth. FML

by Moth_Balled / 12/14/2015 at 11:50pm / Australia / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend backed out on our date so he could help his best friend get ready for some kind of drag queen competition. FML

by strictly cum prancing / 12/11/2015 at 2:48pm / United States / Love

Today, I burped in front of my crush. Well, not really in front of him. I turned around mid-burp and noticed him, not knowing anyone was there. The surprise made me scream a little, which only amplified the burp. So I made this mighty belch-turned-scream noise, while maintaining eye contact with him. FML

by killmenow / 12/03/2015 at 12:33am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Love

Today, my spineless shitwhip of a boss made me go fire a notoriously abusive employee. I had to act like firing him was my decision, even though I'm the secretary. Now I get to live in constant fear that the guy was serious when he threatened to find out where I live and kill me. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2015 at 1:57am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I went on my first date in six years. The guy was unbelievably creepy, and I couldn't wait for it to be over. Right after we finished eating, he told me he loved me, then tried to lean in for a kiss. He looked like he was going to cry when I turned him down. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2015 at 12:25am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I had a boyfriend who wanted to wait until marriage before having sex. When I came home, I realised he must have married my roommate. FML

by Anonymous / 11/27/2015 at 1:42am / France (Corse) / Intimacy

Today, while driving home, I saw a cop with a speed gun "hidden" by the side of the road. I went to slow down so the fuck-knob wouldn't be able to ticket me. I then had a brain-fart and floored the gas instead of hitting the brakes. Hello speeding ticket. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2015 at 3:13pm / United States (Nevada) / Transportation

Today, my friend and I were having a casual discussion about sex. Blowjobs came up and my friend said she'd never dared to give one, arguing that swallowing sperm can make you pregnant. I then had to go on with a 30 minute argument with her on how that's not possible. She's 26. FML

by LilPie / 11/19/2015 at 5:10pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy