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brewmasterg

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brewmasterg

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4756
  • Number of comments : 121
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About brewmasterg : Fuck food, I'd rather have tattoos.

brewmasterg's page activity

Visits<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - 23 hours ago<b>adamrjprice</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:10am<b>officiallatina</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 1:20am<b>SkittlesGoRawr</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 10:48pm<b>mysteryguy3039</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 8:03am<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 4:24am<b>tallwhiteguy96</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 1:59am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 1:00pm<b>xLIGHTS</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 3:16pm<b>AmericaAmurka</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 3:40pm<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 9:12am<b>starcaller17</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 1:07am<b>PenguinBitch</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 9:49pm<b>DeathcoreDoge</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:19pm<b>totallybananas</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 6:34am<b>TheDarkKnight34</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 12:19am<b>ironhead</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 6:01pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 5:34pm

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brewmasterg's favorite FMLs

Today, I came out to my parents. I don't really fit any stereotype, I'm just an average guy who happens to be into guys. Ten minutes later, I overheard my mother say to my step-dad, "Should we redecorate his room pink?" FML

#20008307
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26975) - you deserved it (5664)

On 08/07/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by ohai95 (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, my girlfriend tried to convince me that she never takes dumps. I told her that as long as she eats, it's a biological impossibility, but she seems to have genuinely deluded herself into thinking it's true, purely because she is a girl. FML

#19997167
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20781) - you deserved it (2798)

On 08/01/2012 at 8:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I had an ovarian cyst rupture at work, causing sudden severe stomach cramps; this caused my bowels to release everything right then and there, while on the phone with a customer, in the middle of the call center surrounded by 200 other sales reps. FML

#19991299
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29536) - you deserved it (1466)

On 07/29/2012 at 7:34pm - health - by sy123 (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my son got to my great grandfather's old stopwatch, which had been valued at a very high sum, and broke it by twisting the hands in reverse. He says he was trying to time travel. FML

#19990926
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20604) - you deserved it (3079)

On 07/29/2012 at 2:49pm - kids - by oink oink fuck off - United Kingdom (Doncaster)

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

#19981825
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21047) - you deserved it (4806)

On 07/24/2012 at 4:08pm - health - by *facefloor* (man) - United States

Today, I went to my local coffee shop. I soon witnessed the girl making my drink apparently dislodge a wedgie from her ass-crack and then sneeze into her hands. When I confronted her, she loudly accused me of "visually molesting" her. FML

#19974801
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23415) - you deserved it (1897)

On 07/22/2012 at 12:48pm - misc - by bitchimgay (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my sister and I had a huge fight because I flushed the toilet while she was taking a bath. The faucet for the bath was not running, but she insisted that she felt the water in the tub turn "scalding hot." She won't listen when I try to explain to her that it doesn't work like that. FML

#19972921
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25527) - you deserved it (1725)

On 07/22/2012 at 2:54am - misc - by Raaaaage - United States (California)

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been in love with for the past two years. Five minutes in, he passed out on top of me from a pain pill overdose and had a mini seizure. He finally woke up and groans, "Those bastards! They confiscated my clothes!" FML

#19966963
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25554) - you deserved it (4724)

On 07/21/2012 at 3:40am - intimacy - by Lucy - United States (California)

Today, I went to a big family dinner. At one point, my cousin ran up to me, sobbing hysterically, holding his crotch, and making a huge scene. Turns out that while taking a piss, he "accidentally" swatted his willy with an electric bug zapper. I can't believe I'm related to this little shit. FML

#19941503
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21235) - you deserved it (2952)

On 07/15/2012 at 3:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I sold yet another £100 bottle of lotion to a stuck-up teenage fashionista with less brain-power than the yapping bastard of a dog she carried in her arms. She did nothing but brag the whole time about her jewelry, and openly mocked me for only making minimum wage. FML

#19933084
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25851) - you deserved it (2370)

On 07/13/2012 at 3:08pm - work - by fucking pissants (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I'm accused of vandalizing a cop car during a night of partying, and in so doing, violating my parole. While talking with my lawyer, who I spent all my savings on, I said he could hire better than his hideous secretary. Turns out she's his wife. I think I'm now more screwed than ever. FML

#19915477
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5457) - you deserved it (53088)

On 07/09/2012 at 5:06pm - misc - by jillie minaj (woman) - United States

Today, I'm having heart surgery. The doc came in, donut in one hand and papers in another. While I was filling them out, his hands kept trembling, and he dropped the donut on the floor. He fumbled to pick it up and kept eating. The guy I'm entrusting my life to doesn't even respect the five-second rule. FML

#19914869
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24761) - you deserved it (1975)

On 07/09/2012 at 2:25pm - health - by deadman (man) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

#19903364
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29875) - you deserved it (3575)

On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I woke up to my drunk great grandfather peeing on my cat and thinking it was absolutely hysterical. This isn't the first time and he just moved in with me for the next six weeks. FML

#19894625
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19629) - you deserved it (1827)

On 07/05/2012 at 9:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my mom called to chew me out for having my sister arrested. My sister broke into my apartment, rearranged my living room, and claimed she now lived with me. She then threatened me with a butcher's knife for not appreciating what she had done. My mom wants me to pay the bail. FML

#19884123
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33683) - you deserved it (2262)

On 07/03/2012 at 1:36am - misc - by needmorelocks - United States (California)



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