About breekittenmitten : My name is Bailey and that's all you need to know about me.
breekittenmitten's FML badges
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
breekittenmitten's favorite FMLs
Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law decided that she is going to be in charge of planning my wedding. All decisions must be approved by her, and anything she doesn't like will be thrown out. She also wants to go on our honeymoon with us to make sure I don't "defile" her son. FML
by Anonymous / 05/20/2016 at 3:38pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, even though my boyfriend knew that I was a devout catholic before he asked me on a date, he's pissed that I keep refusing to have sex. Apparently, he thought I was just playing hard to get and that I would eventually drop my panties like all the other slutty "religious" girls he claims to have fucked. FML
by Bethany / 05/20/2016 at 3:31pm / Germany / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/20/2016 at 12:59pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/20/2016 at 7:29am / United States (New Jersey) / Health
Today, I went on a date with a guy I've been talking to. We ended up at his house around 4 a.m., but as we walked through the front door, his ex girlfriend was sitting on the couch, apparently waiting for him to get home. They still live together. FML
by aireeahna / 05/20/2016 at 2:04am / United States (Iowa) / Love
by bruised / 05/19/2016 at 4:54pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
by goldenpuppy / 05/19/2016 at 4:54pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals
Today, my boyfriend found the box of photos I've been saving for my daughter. He was convinced I was pining over her father and emptied the box into the dumpster behind our apartment. I'm still not done digging through the garbage to find the photos from the day my daughter was born. FML
by rummaging / 05/18/2016 at 9:46am / United States (Illinois) / Love
by centaursTesticle / 05/18/2016 at 8:34am / United States / Work
by ShouldIHelpIt / 05/17/2016 at 10:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals
Today, I got a call from the head of my school dance committee saying that the dance was cancelled and the services originally hired were still expecting to be paid. The reason the dance got cancelled? One of the girls on the committee's parents wouldn't let her buy her dream dress. FML
by Depressed / 05/17/2016 at 7:16pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend and I were on a date and he starts complaining about how his back is hurting him. He complains the whole evening. Fast forward to later that night, we are in bed so I ask him if he was feeling OK. He says, "I guess so. I'm just confused about my feelings for you." FML
by bluskyz1979 / 05/17/2016 at 11:32am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I was food shamed by my boyfriend in front of an entire restaurant and his parents because my meal cost more than his. His mom chimed in saying her meal usually costs more than his step dad's too and not to be upset. I'm 8 months pregnant, of course mine costs more. FML
by Preggo / 05/14/2016 at 1:11pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
by captainuniverse / 05/14/2016 at 1:53am / United States (Tennessee) / Kids
Today, at work, the shopping carts have coin locks on them so people put them back or don't go stealing them. A lady couldn't find a coin, so I unlocked one with my key and said to her, "It doesn't look like you will run off and steal it" as a joke. She replied, "I can't run darling, I have an artificial leg." FML
by TrolleyCollector / 05/13/2016 at 5:10am / Australia (Victoria) / Work
- Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said "I can't do this any more" and pulled out.… Today, while walking down the street, a cute guy approached me. We ended up having some drinks then… Today, I got an iPhone, I was excited and because I have a new number I wanted to mess with my girl…
- Today, under the Northern Lights of the Arctic Circle, I presented my girlfriend with an engagement… Today, a lady came for a death certificate at the city hall reception where I work. Reflexively, I… Today, I’m a babysitter for a 4 year-old little girl. All afternoon, I attended Barbie’s murder and…