Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

breekittenmitten

Search for a member

breekittenmitten

34Fucked!

breekittenmitten
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 November 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5254
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About breekittenmitten : My name is Bailey, I'm 17. I'm a cosmetologist, and I'm addicted to tattoo's, gaming, and American Horror Story.
All I want in life is cats and to be taller so yeah

breekittenmitten's page activity

Visits<b>christofferkamal</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 1:27am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 9:58pm<b>Jake42100</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 10:35am<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 4:44am<b>acevango</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 5:37pm<b>insanecutie</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 2:24pm<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 8:36am<b>Lukin</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 8:03am<b>RA91</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 6:48am<b>murr52727</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 2:56am<b>loganswann</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 11:54pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 11:42pm<b>hallieee</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 11:21pm<b>gis0392</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 10:46pm<b>DOMEinic</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 9:03am<b>A07</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 9:53pm<b>eleanorrigby90</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 7:26pm<b>emmathindra</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 5:03pm

Fucked!<b>christofferkamal</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 2:14pm<b>RA91</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 12:48pm<b>hallieee</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 5:21am<b>ShroomSalad</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 10:28pm<b>jjeffriesftw</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 2:26am<b>GrinchFu1</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 4:38am<b>Killer_Spoon</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 10:06pm<b>sandman676</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 4:16am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 12:30pm<b>Mons</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 2:39pm<b>ausmoss123</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 8:16am<b>chandler88</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 5:24am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 9:16am<b>JPjenny</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 1:35pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 8:02am<b>SilkMudah</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 5:32am<b>FuKcMee</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 7:15pm<b>Maaska</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 5:28am

breekittenmitten's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of breekittenmitten's badges

breekittenmitten's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a phone call letting me know my grandmother was arrested for trying to light my grandpa on fire. She's now in jail, asking for bail money. FML

#21461945
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22535) - you deserved it (1312)

On 08/29/2015 at 12:29am - misc - by tkoester - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was going down on my boyfriend when he stood up on the bed to get a different experience. I started to get aggressive and pushed him up against the wall. I forgot our bed was on wheels and the bed started sliding away and his body slid down the wall. So much for being sexy. FML

#21461787
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19504) - you deserved it (3689)

On 08/28/2015 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by still laughing (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out that I won't be able to attend my own wedding, because I'll be in a mandatory training class that doesn't allow people to take vacation for any reason. So now we've wasted $10,000, and I can't even fly home for one day. All because I got promoted unexpectedly. FML

#21461761
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24123) - you deserved it (1876)

On 08/28/2015 at 4:05pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Friuli-Venezia Giulia)

Today, I decided to give my dog a bath. Instead, my dog gave me a bath. FML

#21461710
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17092) - you deserved it (3147)

On 08/28/2015 at 1:18pm - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend uninvited to me a party because she said her ex would be there, and since she hasn't told him about us, she didn't want him getting upset. FML

#21461601
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24784) - you deserved it (2404)

On 08/28/2015 at 3:21am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after missing college for a week due to illness, I found out my "friends" were bullshitting me about us having to write an important no-extension Biology essay. Copious amounts of my sweat, snot and tears went into that desperation-fueled nightmare. Thanks, dickheads. FML

#21461594
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22552) - you deserved it (2159)

On 08/28/2015 at 2:39am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I washed all the dishes and cups from the family dinner last night and put them away. When my wife saw, she had a mini OCD breakdown and yelled at me because the cups weren't lined up with each other with the handles aligned and the flower pictures facing out left. FML

#21461576
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20348) - you deserved it (2679)

On 08/28/2015 at 1:41am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I happily announced to my parents that I'm pregnant. My dad later handed me a printout containing a list of nearby abortion clinics. FML

#21461568
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23922) - you deserved it (2121)

On 08/28/2015 at 1:06am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after working 8 hours and immediately packing my house for another 6 hours to prepare for moving, I was extremely exhausted and more than ready to brush my teeth and go to bed. I tiredly brushed my teeth with my mascara. FML

#21461561
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21464) - you deserved it (3777)

On 08/28/2015 at 12:40am - misc - by morethanablondemoment - United States (California)

Today, I came home from a business trip and was greeted by a foul smell. I soon found out my husband accidentally let the milk go bad by leaving it out all day, then tried to solve the problem by "balancing the temperatures" by putting it in the freezer. Oh honey, no. Just no. FML

#21461314
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19683) - you deserved it (1557)

On 08/27/2015 at 12:18pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, my bitch of a sister broke my new phone, which took me months of work to earn. Her excuse? If I didn't want her to break it, I shouldn't have let her use it. FML

#21461274
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22268) - you deserved it (2023)

On 08/27/2015 at 8:43am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bexley)

Today, due to medication I am taking that causes constipation, I have become all too accustomed to using a disposable rubber glove to dig crap out of my own butthole. FML

#21461256
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23976) - you deserved it (2062)

On 08/27/2015 at 6:56am - health - by jack - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was telling my coworker that I was considering quitting the shady, 50-shades-of-scum business we work at. He snitched to our boss, who quickly fired me on bullshit charges of incompetence, theft, and workplace bullying. I guess I'm not getting a good reference from him. FML

#21461238
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19028) - you deserved it (5148)

On 08/27/2015 at 4:37am - work - by Anon (man) - United States

Today, I was going down the elevator in my dorm and a friend joined on another floor. He then thought it was a good time to tell me that he slept with my girlfriend when the elevator got stuck. Worst 40 minutes of my life. FML

#21461236
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23627) - you deserved it (1368)

On 08/27/2015 at 4:23am - misc - by smyp - Lithuania



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: