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Today, I had a basketball game against our rivals. Since the starting guard had a broken ankle, I felt happy that I could finally get playing time and prove that I'm good. Instead I had to run the scoreboard for the game, because the scoreboard guy was absent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31478) - you deserved it (2306)
On 07/08/2009 at 1:49am - misc - by Benchthewarmer (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me at the zoo. With a Ring Pop. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56889) - you deserved it (9494)
On 07/04/2009 at 12:49am - love - by Cococautly (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, while watching The Many Adventures of Winnie-the-Pooh with my 5 year old, I realized why the kangaroo's name is Kanga, and why her son's name is Roo. Kanga-Roo. Get it? Yeah. I didn't until today. I'm 47. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16709) - you deserved it (36877)
On 07/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by slightlyslow (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad was having an affair on my mom with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52728) - you deserved it (1606)
On 07/01/2009 at 12:08am - misc - by lawoman27 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I went to my 7 year old son's school for a conference with his teacher. When I got there, the teacher said "she adored me for who and what I am". I was puzzled. Turns out my son told his class that I am a "lesbian American." Wrong. I'm Lebanese-American. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47056) - you deserved it (2849)
On 06/30/2009 at 12:17pm - kids - by lebanesewoman (woman) - Hong Kong
Today, I was at walmart when my stomach began to hurt. I quickly waddled to the restroom in pain. As soon as I got in the stall, a huge crap exploded out of me. The child in the stall next to me started crying. When her mom asked what was wrong she said that I'd "killed her nose". FML
I agree, your life sucks (49127) - you deserved it (6971)
On 06/30/2009 at 7:53am - health - by poopshooter101 (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I had my first kiss standing in front of my front door. It was really cute, the way you normally think about first kisses. When I got inside, I realized my mom had been watching out her second story bedroom window taking pictures. She put them on Facebook captioned 'My baby's first kiss!' FML
I agree, your life sucks (78408) - you deserved it (4702)
On 06/28/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by steven (man) - Cayman Islands
Today, I had my first kiss standing in front of my front door. It was really cute, the way you normally think about first kisses. When I got inside, I realized my mom had been watching out her second story bedroom window taking pictures. She put them on Facebook captioned 'My baby's first kiss!' FML
I agree, your life sucks (78408) - you deserved it (4702)
On 06/28/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by steven (man) - Cayman Islands
Today, I went on a blind date a girl from work had set me up with. Apparently my co-worker thinks I'm gay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38960) - you deserved it (3019)
On 06/28/2009 at 12:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was sitting at the park with a friend when a small child approached us. Just as moved off the bridge to let the kid play, he asked if I would like to play the troll under the bridge. I laughed and said no thanks, to which the kid responded 'but there is nobody else ugly enough.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (40393) - you deserved it (2845)
On 06/27/2009 at 9:00pm - kids - by failure (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)
Today, I was at Disneyland with some of my friends. While eating lunch, we watched a small child get frightened by the person dressed as Mickey Mouse. We all burst out laughing only to be jumped by Chip and Dale. Apparently I scream louder than the little kid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5854) - you deserved it (34333)
On 06/26/2009 at 11:44pm - misc - by FailureAtLife121 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I realized that my company's calendar is synchronized throughout the whole building. The entire company now knows that I made love to my wife last Wednesday and Friday, and that I went out with a girl named Janet on Saturday. My wife's name is Julie, and she works in the same building. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7329) - you deserved it (118309)
On 06/26/2009 at 9:32pm - work - by Fred (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I asked my mother if we could test me for OCD, since so many people have suggested to me that I might have it. She smiles at me and says, "No, honey, you're just really really weird." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34867) - you deserved it (4913)
On 06/26/2009 at 3:48pm - health - by sad_panda (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I went to write "Happy Bday, I Love You" on my girlfriend's car windows to surprise her when she woke up. I was the one who got the surprise when I saw her, in her backseat, having sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64842) - you deserved it (2661)
On 06/24/2009 at 2:13am - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to write "Happy Bday, I Love You" on my girlfriend's car windows to surprise her when she woke up. I was the one who got the surprise when I saw her, in her backseat, having sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64842) - you deserved it (2661)
On 06/24/2009 at 2:13am - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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