About breathemein : 18. Boston. Senior
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Today, I was hit on by a guy who decided to use the line, "My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26685) - you deserved it (3129)
On 12/14/2009 at 4:05am - love - by luckygirl (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I went to the doctor to check the dark growth I just discovered on my back. It was chocolate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4417) - you deserved it (28509)
On 12/13/2009 at 10:53pm - health - by sillygoose (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I saw my four-year-old son running around outside, and copying everything our dog was doing. I thought it was cute, so I went to grab the camera. When I went back outside, I saw my dog eating a dead rabbit, and my son doing the same. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30440) - you deserved it (4298)
On 12/13/2009 at 7:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out why two of my friends race downstairs to each other to the cafeteria everyday at lunch; apparently there's only one free seat at the table with the rest of their friends, and the loser has to eat lunch with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26008) - you deserved it (1951)
On 12/12/2009 at 6:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I went down on my girlfriend after sharing a romantic moment. As I was licking, she giggled and said "You sound like a dog." Romance ruined. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11652) - you deserved it (2644)
On 12/09/2009 at 10:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, during our championship field hockey game, my mouthguard fell into a mass of geese poop. The referee made me put it back in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41361) - you deserved it (3119)
On 09/24/2009 at 6:10pm - work - by ewewew (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I'm in my fourth month of training in the US Navy. I'm 3000 miles from home. I joined to give my wife a better life. Since I've been gone, she decided that she liked being single. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35621) - you deserved it (3439)
On 09/19/2009 at 2:18am - love - by singlesailor (man) - United States (California)
Today, my long-distance boyfriend was at my house for a 10-day visit. He told me that we'd never spent so much time together, so he didn't know me well and now, he'd finally met the "real me". He doesn't like it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32287) - you deserved it (7073)
On 07/24/2009 at 10:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Brazil
Today, I was in an elevator with my dad and several strangers. When the elevator voice said, "Going down," my dad excitedly said, "Man, I love it when she says that!" loudly enough for everyone to hear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34742) - you deserved it (3255)
On 07/24/2009 at 6:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had my first date with this guy I really like, who came to pick me up. Once I got into his car, my uncle comes out of the house and yells "Remember, pregnant girls aren't allowed to drink." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36656) - you deserved it (6812)
On 07/23/2009 at 1:39pm - misc - by Prego my ego - Sent from mobile version
Today, I had my first date with this guy I really like, who came to pick me up. Once I got into his car, my uncle comes out of the house and yells "Remember, pregnant girls aren't allowed to drink." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36656) - you deserved it (6812)
On 07/23/2009 at 1:39pm - misc - by Prego my ego - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was waiting in line with a friend, and she poked my stomach and said, "I wish I had your stomach." I asked her why. She said, "Boys wouldn't flirt with me." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39195) - you deserved it (3753)
On 07/19/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by Pusillanimous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend watching a movie, my boyfriend then leans in and says: "You know, you're my favourite girlfriend." I then jokingly responded by saying: "You say that like I'm not the only girlfriend you have right now." I hate being right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49011) - you deserved it (3387)
On 07/14/2009 at 10:02am - misc - by dinapar (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend who dumped me after 2 1/2 years because I got fat. The last two years I've lost 68 lbs, am happier and couldn't wait to shove that in his face. So, of course the first time he see's me I'm alone, pushing a shopping cart full of ice cream for a party later. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40382) - you deserved it (5036)
On 07/08/2009 at 9:28pm - love - by WeightAMinute (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was looking at my friend's dad's Facebook pictures because he recently posted a status update. I saw him at a bar with some ugly hooker that he was feeling up in almost every picture. After about 10 minutes of ridiculing and laughing at this ugly woman, I realize it's my mom in a wig. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42717) - you deserved it (5855)
On 07/08/2009 at 8:07pm - love - by disturbed2103 (man) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
