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About brasileirinha : I love this website :)
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I tried on the new dress I bought for myself. I, for once, thought I looked pretty all right. I asked my dog, "How do I look?" and she threw up on my pillow. My brother can't stop laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19608) - you deserved it (3188)
On 11/14/2010 at 4:42am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I went to the library to pick up Romeo and Juliet, for my English class. After looking around for half an hour, I asked the librarian. "I couldn't find Shakespeare anywhere. Where could I find him?" She quickly replied "He's dead", giggled to herself, and went back to her work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16184) - you deserved it (5959)
On 10/26/2010 at 3:48am - misc - by skippy_liz (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I watched a stray dog hump a garden gnome in my front yard. So did my two year old daughter. I've already had to stop her "re-enactments" twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26092) - you deserved it (3130)
On 07/11/2010 at 4:05am - intimacy - by awkwardsituation - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was eating a hotdog. My huge Siberian Husky, upon becoming aware of this, jumped up on me. He forced his tongue into my mouth and ate the food I was in the middle of eating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20242) - you deserved it (4836)
On 03/10/2010 at 8:14pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4431) - you deserved it (35497)
On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, feeling down and dejected because of the shitty weather and none of my friends or family wanting to spend time with me to feel loved I took my favorite stuffed animal and that says 'I love you' when you squeeze it. I squeezed it. Nothing happened. Even an inanimate object rejected me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17726) - you deserved it (4337)
On 02/27/2010 at 8:32pm - love - by dejected (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my boss made me some Tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my number 1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19240) - you deserved it (3641)
On 02/23/2010 at 12:17am - work - by meaganlea (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was standing at the top of the stairs petting my dog. The doorbell rang and my dog bolted down the stairs, tripping me. I fell down the whole flight of stairs backwards. Turns out the person at the door was my brother who had locked himself out. I almost died for no reason. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15050) - you deserved it (3175)
On 02/11/2010 at 1:14am - love - by sari14 - United States (Virginia)
Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21496) - you deserved it (5346)
On 02/10/2010 at 7:03pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7647) - you deserved it (24852)
On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I learned that as adorable as it might be to watch your cat follow your cursor around the screen, the humor ends when she dives into and breaks the monitor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6426) - you deserved it (15263)
On 11/26/2009 at 4:22am - animals - by MouseChaser (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while on a vacation, I tried to step out of myself and flirt with this boy who I thought was cute. He was going along with it and nodding so I thought it was working. Then he opened his mouth and I realized he didn't speak English. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16893) - you deserved it (4466)
On 11/25/2009 at 1:06am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I sent a get well card to my friend. it wasn't until after I got home from posting it did I realise that the stamps I put on the envelope had the phrase "Let's Get Active" on them with drawings of people playing sports. My friend is in a wheelchair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16508) - you deserved it (7926)
On 11/14/2009 at 5:26pm - health - by Insensitive (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I asked a girl I like out. She ended up having an asthma attack because she was laughing so hard. I guess that's a no. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28579) - you deserved it (1686)
On 11/14/2009 at 1:38pm - love - by asthma_attacker (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my band played for our school. We were cheered for and everything. Being the lead singer I tried to look cool and push the mic away and pull it back by pushing down the bottom of the stand with my foot. It hit my face and I bled like crazy but I kept singing. No one clapped at the end. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6183) - you deserved it (21813)
On 11/14/2009 at 2:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)
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