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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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bobmandude

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bobmandude
  • Town/Country : Princeton, US
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 December 1987 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 840
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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bobmandude's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. Shes on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

#13661699 (403)

I agree, your life sucks (48543) - you deserved it (6289)

On 10/31/2010 at 9:30am - intimacy - by Tai - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML

#13572879 (265)

I agree, your life sucks (9552) - you deserved it (29603)

On 10/24/2010 at 3:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, before a big client pitch I went into their office bathroom to quickly slick down my hair. It had two identical automatic faucets, one for water and one for hand soap. Now my hair is full of soap, and smells like industrial strength lavender. FML

#13548383 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (5633) - you deserved it (16859)

On 10/22/2010 at 9:26am - work - by soapypete (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I met my roommate for the first time. I walked in the door to see him in full Roman gladiator gear, screaming at the computer because he lost 18 knights. He also told me he wakes up every 3 hours to make sure his army is still intact. FML

#13521547 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (27094) - you deserved it (2104)

On 10/20/2010 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to class with my bag packed for a weekend trip when it began to vibrate violently. Stopping mid-lecture, the professor approached me and asked politely if I could turn off my cell phone as I was disturbing the other 150 pupils in the class. It was my personal vibrator. FML

#13462188 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (6953) - you deserved it (27396)

On 10/15/2010 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

#13337964 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (28632) - you deserved it (2429)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out my older brother put tanning lotion in the lotion I use to masturbate with. Now I have orange palms and an orange penis which won't go away for weeks. FML

#13278835 (363)

I agree, your life sucks (13020) - you deserved it (28890)

On 10/01/2010 at 6:12pm - intimacy - by caughtorangehanded (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found a video of my girlfriend having sex with her male best friend on her computer. When I confronted her about it she said it was from before we met. In the video, she was wearing the engagement ring I bought her. FML

#13221362 (209)

I agree, your life sucks (44849) - you deserved it (2265)

On 09/27/2010 at 11:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to pour myself a cup of coffee and noticed our kittens were playing in the living room. Transfixed by the cuteness, I didn't notice I started pouring hot coffee on my hand and foot. FML

#13183751 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (6603) - you deserved it (17641)

On 09/24/2010 at 3:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my chemistry professor made us all leave our classroom mid-lab because the class was complaining of the smell, and he was worried that there was a gas leak from one of the Bunsen burners. There wasn't, but it's nice to know my "silent but deadly" smelled like it might actually kill. FML

#13169331 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (7036) - you deserved it (21835)

On 09/23/2010 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was on my way home on an airplane. The guy I had to sit next to was reading a book with naked girls in it. About 15 minutes into the flight, he had an erection and started to giggle. It was a 2 hour flight. FML

#13124550 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (25151) - you deserved it (2077)

On 09/20/2010 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Thomas - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was doing my homework on the computer when my dad walked by with a plate of food, threw his fork at me, and said "POSTURE!" FML

#13087587 (215)

I agree, your life sucks (16507) - you deserved it (4691)

On 09/17/2010 at 4:33pm - misc - by huwauw (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, it was the first day of astronomy class and we all waited for the professor to enter the classroom. All of a sudden, someone turns the lights off, it's pitch black, and we hear the professor saying, "Greetings earthlings..." It's going to be a long semester. FML

#13070220 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (15204) - you deserved it (12801)

On 09/16/2010 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying he needed me to bail him out of jail. The crime? Masturbating in public. FML

#13027296 (264)

I agree, your life sucks (30131) - you deserved it (4183)

On 09/12/2010 at 10:29pm - intimacy - by nickim756 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was recovering from an operation. After I felt better, I checked my phone. There were 35 missed calls and angry text messages from my boyfriend asking why I wasn't at his house to cook his dinner. FML

#13017845 (196)

I agree, your life sucks (26634) - you deserved it (4156)

On 09/12/2010 at 10:02am - love - by mrsfantastic - United Kingdom