About blueknight1st : Nothing much to say
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, my 43-year-old brother's obsession with Breaking Bad reached a new level of stupidity when he nearly got us beaten up by a bunch of meth-heads down by our local park. He went to them with his shaved head and stupid hat, and tried to act all Walter White with them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12701) - you deserved it (1192)
On 09/10/2012 at 2:06am - misc - by NotJessePinkmanFFS (man) - United States (California)
Today, I walked downstairs with a couple of bags full of stuff, in preparation for a sleepover at my friend's house. My nine-year-old cousin looked at me and said, "Where're you going? Fat camp?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (13293) - you deserved it (2320)
On 09/09/2012 at 1:02pm - health - by Char (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)
Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22875) - you deserved it (4389)
On 08/30/2012 at 10:45pm - intimacy - by Geckosrock99 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13950) - you deserved it (2259)
On 08/09/2012 at 10:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I saw the girl that I've had a crush on forever riding her horse on the side of the road. She waved, and without thinking, I honked my horn in response. Her horse bucked her off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15995) - you deserved it (9983)
On 08/01/2012 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I'm going to court to give an eyewitness account of a robbery. Unfortunately, I had a wacky dream last night concerning the robbery, and no longer have any idea of what actually happened in real life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23100) - you deserved it (2204)
On 07/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by Dreamer (man) - United States (California)
Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13103) - you deserved it (1389)
On 06/30/2012 at 9:00pm - misc - by pissed off -
Today, I learned that I do not possess the upper body, core, or leg strength to hold my girlfriend up during sex. I simultaneously collapsed and dropped her onto her coffee table. We are now both being treated at the hospital; her for glass wounds, me for a concussion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10559) - you deserved it (18302)
On 06/29/2012 at 4:47am - intimacy - by bob (man) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that the only way I can convince my husband to start working out is by convincing him that we are training for when the "zombie outbreak" happens. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14787) - you deserved it (2374)
On 06/28/2012 at 7:44pm - misc - by zombieguyswife (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I told my friend over the phone that I had to go drop the kids off at the pool. She told me that she didn't need to know about my bathroom habits and hung up on me. I really had to take my children to the local swimming pool for swim lessons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16014) - you deserved it (1738)
On 06/25/2012 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34126) - you deserved it (2875)
On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)
Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21179) - you deserved it (1907)
On 06/12/2012 at 9:02am - love - by fledermausi (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)
Today, I texted my friend and asked her what her sad status on Facebook was about. She texted me back saying her step-mother had passed away. I tried to reply with "awwh" but my phone autocorrected it to "ahaha." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24098) - you deserved it (4923)
On 05/27/2012 at 3:19am - misc - by iPhonekid - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17454) - you deserved it (1888)
On 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm - misc - by Jacquelinez (woman) - United States
Today, I spilled boiling water on my legs. A coworker told me that putting mustard on the burn would heal it. I ended up at the emergency room. When people walked by I could hear them say "it smells like hot dogs". FML
I agree, your life sucks (14151) - you deserved it (5563)
On 05/20/2012 at 11:03am - health - by jcdc - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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