About blueberrypsycho :
i tend to not like writing stuff like this, so i just don't. but don't be a stranger if you want to talk to me :)
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Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27984) - you deserved it (12231)
On 07/16/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by McKenna - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44009) - you deserved it (3610)
On 06/30/2011 at 3:24am - misc - by asianlover (woman) - Finland (Western Finland)
Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19615) - you deserved it (31222)
On 06/26/2011 at 9:08pm - health - by kaplwv116 - United States (Illinois)
Today, as I passed my fiancé the pancakes I had just made, he vocalised his happiness with a groan that was EXACTLY like the one he makes when we have sex. So on a sexiness rating, I'm a pancake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29170) - you deserved it (7733)
On 06/24/2011 at 6:45am - intimacy - by Eve (woman) - Ireland (Cork)
Today, I was working the register at our local McDonald's. After a strange man left a massive order, he said, "Can I pay you in gummy worms?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28018) - you deserved it (2946)
On 06/16/2011 at 2:37am - work - by Hank Gummyworm - United States (Michigan)
Today, on my way home from work, I decided to bring my pregnant wife a bouquet of roses to surprise her. Her response? "Why didn't you get me something useful, like chicken wings, instead?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (34903) - you deserved it (8898)
On 06/09/2011 at 7:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that fist pumping during sex is not romantic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32069) - you deserved it (4719)
On 06/06/2011 at 3:44am - intimacy - by ... - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my mom publicly pole danced. In a playground. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45480) - you deserved it (4168)
On 05/30/2011 at 11:46am - misc - by Jess - United States
Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13522) - you deserved it (58374)
On 05/29/2011 at 11:34pm - intimacy - by yummy - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my genius boyfriend was trying to remember a particular island in the Caribbean that was used by pirates in the past. I offered up Morocco. I heard him facepalm over the phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6067) - you deserved it (36659)
On 05/27/2011 at 1:46am - love - by Derp-A-Herp (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out what getting slapped in the face with lettuce feels like. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20551) - you deserved it (6352)
On 05/27/2011 at 1:26am - misc - by moe - United States
Today, I sent my boyfriend a well thought out, steamy, and sexy sext message. His reply? "Three bidders for my drums on eBay! Makiiin' Monaaaay!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25237) - you deserved it (4679)
On 05/19/2011 at 10:08pm - intimacy - by rileycrash (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my girlfriend asked if we could spice up our sex life. She didn't think it was too funny when I laid out all of our spices on the bed. She now refuses to have sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16950) - you deserved it (54853)
On 05/16/2011 at 1:40am - intimacy - by phoenix101 -
Today, I finally mustered the courage to tell my crush how I feel. He's a straight-A student and very nice in general. After I finished pouring my heart out, he stared at me for a bit and then said: "Nice rack." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30555) - you deserved it (8870)
On 05/10/2011 at 4:36am - intimacy - by Dana (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7070) - you deserved it (41809)
On 05/02/2011 at 5:33am - misc - by Burnt (woman) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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