About blueberrypsycho :
i tend to not like writing stuff like this, so i just don't. but don't be a stranger if you want to talk to me :)
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Today, my dad came to confiscate my phone. I stuck it in between my boobs so he wouldn't be able to see it. He said, "Honey, your breasts aren't big enough to hide that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11124) - you deserved it (27734)
On 10/08/2011 at 1:03pm - misc - by G - United States (California)
Today, I was asked if my bellybutton was an 'innie' or an 'outtie.' My bellybutton has been hidden by fat for so long that I couldn't remember. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8381) - you deserved it (26139)
On 10/06/2011 at 8:40pm - misc - by knzknz - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I saw a man dancing to a Britney Spears song in his Volkswagen Beetle. I started laughing hysterically until he got out. He was huge. I was stuck in traffic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9051) - you deserved it (21119)
On 10/06/2011 at 1:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I came home from school and found my mother singing along to her latest investment, a compilation CD filled with heavy metal covers of ABBA classics. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13905) - you deserved it (2229)
On 10/06/2011 at 6:11am - misc - by kansah (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I showed my boyfriend a calendar, marked with the number of times we've had sex over the past month. Then followed by a calendar of the month before, which had almost triple the number of hits. I had to point out that our stats need to improve. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17962) - you deserved it (12154)
On 10/04/2011 at 3:04am - intimacy - by friskeyk14 - United States (California)
Today, after reading about seduction techniques, I wore shades and a brightly colored shirt to a club to attract female attention. However, the sunglasses rendered me almost blind, and I tripped over a step, crashed into tables, and thanks to the shirt, everyone saw it happen in glorious technicolor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6701) - you deserved it (28407)
On 10/02/2011 at 9:34pm - misc - by hardtoignore - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27405) - you deserved it (8373)
On 10/02/2011 at 3:27am - kids - by TraumatizedMother (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I realized that it has been so long since my wife and I were intimate that I got slightly turned on watching her suck the meat off chicken wings. I'm jealous of fried, sauce-soaked poultry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26500) - you deserved it (3337)
On 10/02/2011 at 2:05am - intimacy - by therevsev - United States
Today, the boys who sit at my math table decided it would be funny to throw broken pencils at my boobs to see if they were real. They did this the entire class period. I have to work with this group for the rest of the school year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19542) - you deserved it (2303)
On 09/29/2011 at 9:56pm - misc - by hellokitty133 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my violent housemate qualified for a gun license. She picks up her bolt-action rifle on Wednesday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20523) - you deserved it (1877)
On 09/29/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by Help. (woman) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull)
Today, my girlfriend changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'It's Complicated' because I didn't give her my last cookie. This happens all the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23815) - you deserved it (8385)
On 09/28/2011 at 10:28pm - love - by danthecomplicate - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my girlfriend changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'It's Complicated' because I didn't give her my last cookie. This happens all the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23815) - you deserved it (8385)
On 09/28/2011 at 10:28pm - love - by danthecomplicate - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28885) - you deserved it (2346)
On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -
Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20173) - you deserved it (6892)
On 09/28/2011 at 12:55am - intimacy - by confused (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28252) - you deserved it (4426)
On 09/27/2011 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Monday 20 May 2013
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