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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, my teacher's comments on my essay read, "I know it's college, but you use a lot of unnecessary words with a lot of syllables." He basically scolded me for having a complex vocabulary. I go to an accredited state university. Nothing says "America" like under-achieving professors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16780) - you deserved it (5592)
On 10/03/2012 at 7:00pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29623) - you deserved it (2884)
Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37205) - you deserved it (3020)
On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)
Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28472) - you deserved it (4127)
On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23080) - you deserved it (6923)
On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)
Today, my boyfriend came over to my parents' house for dinner. My dad made Holocaust jokes the entire time. My boyfriend is Jewish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27583) - you deserved it (3644)
On 02/08/2012 at 12:17am - love - by daughterofanazi (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was driving back home with my family. I had to sit quietly for half an hour, all while pretending I didn't notice my sister playing with herself under the coat on her lap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34373) - you deserved it (2515)
On 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by jjs51 (man) - United States
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29918) - you deserved it (22081)
On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I went to my gyn to see what a painful lump is under my armpit. Turns out it's breast tissue, and yes, it will fill up with milk when I'm pregnant. I essentially have three boobs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28471) - you deserved it (286)
On 09/14/2011 at 12:34pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)
Today, my husband and I had just got over a big argument, and I asked him to cut me some cucumbers for my eyes to help me relax. I was laying down, eyed closed, and he set them on my eyes. They weren't cucumbers, they were lemons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17620) - you deserved it (31126)
On 05/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by lemonhead -
Today, I was dumped. I ran home and cried and ranted on and on to my mother. After about 10 minutes of talking, she threw a book at my face and said, "No wonder he dumped you! You can't shut up!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20912) - you deserved it (10927)
On 01/26/2011 at 8:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was watching a movie. The ending was sad and I started bawling my eyes out. My boyfriend sitting beside me kept looking back and forth between me and the TV, so I asked what he was doing. He replied with, 'I don't know which one is better to watch.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (10836) - you deserved it (16861)
On 10/09/2010 at 10:36am - love - by Kiimmy (woman) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19872) - you deserved it (3265)
On 05/27/2010 at 6:50pm - misc - by Fark (woman) - United Kingdom (Cumbria)
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. Things got kind of heated, so he decided to take off my bra. They cooled back down when a bug flew out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24464) - you deserved it (8450)
On 04/02/2010 at 8:31pm - animals - by BigBangrocksthenight (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I told my brother to piss off. He decided to do exactly that, from the balcony onto my lap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9997) - you deserved it (21824)
On 10/21/2009 at 5:03pm - kids - by holy (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Monday 17 June 2013
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