blitzblade196

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blitzblade196

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 December 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1070
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About blitzblade196 : I'm 17 years old, I like drawing, love having a good time, and I'm headed to college. Message me if you wanna. I'll chat you up. ;)

Spoken for.

blitzblade196's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:28pm<b>Riiley</b> - the 06/19/2011 at 8:21pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:00am<b>4R0X1Gep</b> - the 09/24/2010 at 7:39pm<b>dirtynsweet</b> - the 09/24/2010 at 2:51pm<b>sugarnspicee</b> - the 09/18/2010 at 6:29pm<b>Kirsten1995</b> - the 09/10/2010 at 11:05am<b>greyy_goooose</b> - the 09/07/2010 at 6:18pm<b>katiboo</b> - the 09/07/2010 at 12:08am<b>Ur_REmEdy</b> - the 09/03/2010 at 11:55am<b>cristinaa_</b> - the 09/02/2010 at 9:59pm<b>JohnnyCalifornia</b> - the 09/02/2010 at 2:57am<b>nyrfan1102</b> - the 09/01/2010 at 8:43pm<b>MetalFish</b> - the 09/01/2010 at 7:02pm<b>That_Guy_Jake_JR</b> - the 08/31/2010 at 12:52am<b>DayummAdriana</b> - the 08/31/2010 at 12:45am<b>mr_sphincter</b> - the 08/23/2010 at 8:38pm<b>oxoashleeoxo</b> - the 08/22/2010 at 4:21pm

blitzblade196's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

blitzblade196's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard two of my students having a conversation. One asked what state Arizona was in, and the other replied Canada. I teach sixth grade social studies and they weren't joking. FML

by teacher / 08/31/2010 at 10:50am / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, the girl I like sent me a Facebook message telling me how the message I left on her phone was one of the funniest drunk dials she's ever gotten. I'm debating whether or not I should tell her that I don't drink. FML

by 713 / 08/28/2010 at 9:36pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I was watching TV when a Dentyne gum commercial came on and stated that the average person spends more than 20,000 minutes kissing. I've spent less than three. FML

by doesntkissalot / 08/28/2010 at 12:19pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. According to his Facebook, he had a new girlfriend 16 seconds later. FML

by mollyeyers / 08/22/2010 at 1:02pm / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Love

Today, I found out that my "secret admirer" I've been exchanging letters with for the last three months, and even started developing feelings for, is actually my ex best friend trying to pull a prank on me. FML

by pixiegirl / 08/08/2010 at 3:38pm / United States / Love

Today, I saw a video of me from over the weekend, naked, pretending to be a duck. What the fuck happened that night? FML

by laurenraeee / 05/25/2010 at 1:18am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, my mom bought me some expensive Japanese candy. I opened it, and saw that each chewy candy was wrapped in a thin, hard to peel off wrapper. After trying to get each wrapper off, I determined they were unopen-able and threw them away. I then read the box, saying the wrappers were edible. FML

by Candy / 05/20/2010 at 8:37am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that in Japan there are monkeys that wait tables and work at a tavern. Literally, I have a job a monkey can do. FML

by slickboy0023 / 03/16/2010 at 11:30am / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, as I walked into my class, someone shouted at me, "Wild Snorlax Appeared! Use Your Ultra Balls!", since I am overweight and everyone in class laughed at me. I got made fun of by Pokémon nerds. FML

by snorlax / 01/19/2010 at 7:03pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching 'Caillou'. It was a Christmas special for pre-schoolers. I was quite enjoying myself, when it hit me that my kid had been in bed for an hour. I forget what adult TV is. FML

by Jen / 12/27/2009 at 8:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokémon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokémon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

by MitchFail / 07/23/2009 at 2:42am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was babysitting a little girl down the street. She pulled out her 'memory box', which contained many childhood treasures. After pulling out a variety of dresses and baby pictures, she says, "... and here's my belly button!" and plops an umbilical chord in my hands. FML

by heresmybellybotton / 07/17/2009 at 8:12pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod and leaves. FML

by Tim / 06/16/2009 at 2:15am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking an exam and I knew I was unprepared, so I wrote some cheat notes on my ankle. As I cross my legs to look at my notes, I realize I wore tall boots to class. I can't even cheat properly. FML

by Joe / 04/16/2009 at 12:21pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I texted my boyfriend to see if he wanted to finally have sex today. His response was "Can't, Platinum just came out." I didn't know what that meant so I searched "Platinum 3-22-2009" on Google. I found out he's talking about a new Pokémon game. FML

by thisreallysucks2 / 03/22/2009 at 10:15pm / United States (California) / Intimacy