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birdman19

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birdman19

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 19 July 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3233
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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birdman19's favorite FMLs

Today, I was skiing in Vermont for the third day straight. Since I was getting very little sleep, on the top of the chairlift I let out a huge yawn, pulling a muscle in my face. As I slid down the ramp, everyone saw me thrashing my head around and making funny, painful faces as I fell down. FML

#8292410
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18345) - you deserved it (4232)

On 02/15/2010 at 8:35am - misc - by Floof (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML

#8250331
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8583) - you deserved it (32977)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:56pm - love - by CrappyValentine (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I was racing some mates to the beach and I decided to take a short-cut by jumping over a low wall. I didn't realise the wall was to stop people falling into the stormwater drain. Which is 3 metres deep. And has razor-sharp oysters growing at the bottom. FML

#7965104
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15912) - you deserved it (34996)

On 02/07/2010 at 4:19am - misc - by KiwiBlam (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my parents told me I was conceived at Disneyworld. Monday, I take a class trip to Disneyworld. My friends will be having fun and all I'll be able to think about is my parents having sex. FML

#7957372
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17901) - you deserved it (4420)

On 02/07/2010 at 12:02am - intimacy - by Mike (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML

#7821444
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19966) - you deserved it (5123)

On 02/02/2010 at 7:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad found out I got a tattoo behind his back and is really really upset. When I got home from work my car wasn't in the driveway. When I asked my dad where it was, he replied "you'll get it back when your tattoo comes off." FML

#7638250
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12517) - you deserved it (34888)

On 01/28/2010 at 8:08am - misc - by tattooooooface - United States

Today, I had a 10 hour drive to Las Vegas with only 2 CDs, Taylor Swift and Jason Mraz, and my girlfriend who thinks she's a good singer. FML

#7607342
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36776) - you deserved it (8305)

On 01/27/2010 at 3:35am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was in a tense tiebreak round to win the local pub quiz. As the quizmaster read out more clues, I got the answer, got up and rushed to be the first team to the bar. I tripped, faceplanted. The whole bar laughed, and then I realized that it wasn't a "fastest to the bar" round. FML

#7607297
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6981) - you deserved it (21563)

On 01/27/2010 at 3:24am - misc - by pubquizgenius (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out that when you hit the neighbor's dog with your car, they might chase you a mile with a shotgun. FML

#7493759
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9416) - you deserved it (38042)

On 01/22/2010 at 3:14am - animals - by S.Bunny (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I took a picture of my "privates" on my girlfriends cell phone and set it as her background without her knowing. Minutes later, I heard her mom scream. She has the same phone. FML

#7492476
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7178) - you deserved it (34156)

On 01/22/2010 at 1:25am - intimacy - by masterzach21 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a man I don't know came up to me and started screaming about how "all you damn Mexicans were stealing American's jobs" and he stormed off. I'm Native American, and I'm pretty sure we've been here longer. FML

#7482237
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49494) - you deserved it (3935)

On 01/21/2010 at 7:45pm - misc - by hardtotell (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my boyfriend took me to meet his friends at one of his exclusive "clubs." Expecting it to be his old friends from college, I agreed to go. Apparently, I've been dating a member of the Ku Klux Klan for 2 years. FML

#7380749
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61721) - you deserved it (7066)

On 01/16/2010 at 4:24pm - love - by Awkward (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I made a batch of "special" brownies for a party I was going to tonight. I wrapped them up and put them on the counter with a note that said DO NOT EAT. Later on I came home from some errands to find a tray of half eaten brownies and my ten year old sister passed out on the couch. FML

#7256153
385 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11265) - you deserved it (52958)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:37am - health - by badsister (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I made a batch of "special" brownies for a party I was going to tonight. I wrapped them up and put them on the counter with a note that said DO NOT EAT. Later on I came home from some errands to find a tray of half eaten brownies and my ten year old sister passed out on the couch. FML

#7256153
385 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11265) - you deserved it (52958)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:37am - health - by badsister (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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