birdman19

Search for a member

birdman19

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 19 July 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4549
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

birdman19's page activity

Visits<b></b> - the 01/24/2011 at 2:39am

birdman19's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

birdman19's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered how my ex-girlfriend exacted her revenge. Every item of clothing I own now has sequins. FML

by Luke / 08/05/2010 at 1:00pm / United Kingdom (West Berkshire) / Love

Today, I walked into my bedroom, only to find out that my bed is missing. I have no idea where it is. FML

by Username / 08/04/2010 at 1:18am / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into my bedroom, only to find out that my bed is missing. I have no idea where it is. FML

by Username / 08/04/2010 at 1:18am / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother continued her lifelong habit of talking to anyone who isn't white in extremely slow, exaggerated "caveman" English. She insists that she isn't being racist, but rather is helping. FML

by notmuchfun / 07/20/2010 at 5:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, while working at the bar, I was having a flawless night. Every pour was perfect, every shot expertly measured. I saw my manager for the first time that night, turned to greet him, and knocked over a tray of 30 or so glasses. Two remained unbroken. FML

by barman / 07/17/2010 at 4:51pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, I learned that you should never, ever, under any circumstance, take a laxative and a sleeping pill on the same night. FML

by emilygreeny / 06/18/2010 at 1:42am / United States / Health

Today, while running late to my sister's wedding and rushing to get ready, I accidentally grabbed my travel size shaving cream can in place of my body spray, and quickly drew a blue foaming line across my rental tux. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2010 at 2:07pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, at a debate tournament based on domestic abuse, my partner yells out, "Has anyone considered that maybe the women DESERVED to be beaten?" FML

by Username / 03/16/2010 at 8:46pm / Love

Today, I was telling my sister about the stupid sorts of questions I get asked at work. She looked at me and said "I give you five years until you turn into a raging, chain-smoking corporate bitch." My mom agreed. FML

by ams / 03/12/2010 at 8:23pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I had a strong feeling that someone was watching me as I was undressing to get ready for bed. I conspicuously moved to the door and threw it open to find my step-brother clearly spying on me. We are the same age, live in the same house three weeks a month and in the same English class. FML

by meowtickmeow / 03/11/2010 at 8:18pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for this sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML

by CreepedOut / 03/09/2010 at 1:31am / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, my boss fired me because "I didn't get the right kind of coffee beans." FML

by koletatlow19 / 03/05/2010 at 12:23am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Work

Today, I found out my little sister is a pyromaniac. She set my bed on fire. FML

by Anonymous / 03/02/2010 at 4:16pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fell asleep in a taxi. So did the taxi driver. FML

by Celeste / 03/02/2010 at 4:14am / Singapore / Transportation

Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML

by moneyman22 / 03/01/2010 at 2:09pm / United States (New York) / Kids