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birdman19

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birdman19

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 19 July 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3009
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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birdman19's favorite FMLs

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

#15203950
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36587) - you deserved it (12452)

On 03/05/2011 at 1:55am - misc - by insomnitude (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I woke up after a night out drinking on my sofa, with an electric dog collar around my neck and handcuffs on my wrists. The keys were on the other side of the invisible doggy fence. FML

#15154591
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13204) - you deserved it (34352)

On 02/28/2011 at 8:10pm - health - by stupiddrunk (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I attended the wrong funeral. I spent twenty minutes trying to hide and walk away without being too conspicuous. FML

#15112271
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24062) - you deserved it (7802)

On 02/25/2011 at 7:18am - misc - by Arlbethere (woman) - United Kingdom (Northumberland)

Today, someone started an event on Facebook for tomorrow called Kick A Ginger Day. Over 300 people are attending. There are only two redheads in my school, and I'm one of them. FML

#15078337
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44168) - you deserved it (8749)

On 02/22/2011 at 1:30pm - misc - by Someone (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, at my strictly Catholic grandmother's funeral, I was made to sit in the row behind the rest of the family, because I was born out of wedlock and wasn't a 'real' member. FML

#15055415
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38585) - you deserved it (2493)

On 02/20/2011 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I made the discovery that I'm in a true love triangle; both of my girlfriends are dating one another. FML

#14948891
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13800) - you deserved it (60281)

On 02/12/2011 at 11:52am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML

Today, I flirted with a guy for ten minutes before realizing I was sitting between him and his girlfriend. FML

#14881953
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10915) - you deserved it (38421)

On 02/07/2011 at 12:41pm - love - by Lindsay (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69633) - you deserved it (6562)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I hit a dead deer that had been left in the middle of the road. My car started to make a funny noise and smell, so I pulled over to check it, thinking I blew the tire on some antlers. The deer got stuck in my front wheel, and I'd dragged it more than a mile. And it wasn't actually dead. FML

#14658044
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18781) - you deserved it (41325)

On 01/21/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my extremely lazy roommate is in bed with the flu. Instead of getting up to get water, he's run the garden hose through his window, and instead of going to the bathroom, he's connected a siphon to his penis and run it to a 5-gallon bucket. I have to live with this idiot. FML

#14626510
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31123) - you deserved it (4579)

On 01/18/2011 at 1:35pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that I can't pass a field sobriety test while sober. FML

#14606739
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21860) - you deserved it (4130)

On 01/16/2011 at 10:59pm - misc - by sos (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to 'spice things up in the bedroom'. When I asked how, he said I could try wearing a paper bag over my head. FML

#14393948
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35083) - you deserved it (5515)

On 12/30/2010 at 9:09am - intimacy - by georgiahick -

Today, a woman came to my counter and ordered 12 donuts. I said, "OK sure, a dozen donuts." She paused, looked at me with disgust and yelled, "I said 12, NOT a dozen." FML

#14277072
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44748) - you deserved it (3616)

On 12/20/2010 at 8:52pm - work - by morenita27 (woman) - Canada

Today, my car heater finally died. I deliver pizzas. In Alaska. FML

#14235030
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40825) - you deserved it (3762)

On 12/17/2010 at 12:30pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alaska)



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