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birdfreak

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birdfreak

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8233
  • Number of comments : 496
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About birdfreak : Stuff about me is supposed to go here, but I have nothing interesting to say...
Have a lovely day!

birdfreak's page activity

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birdfreak's FML badges

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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birdfreak's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to walk home in nothing but my snuggie and sneakers. FML

#16501427
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17271) - you deserved it (30355)

On 06/04/2011 at 4:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I fell asleep in class. I'm the teacher. FML

#16450721
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14920) - you deserved it (42968)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:05pm - work - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

#16449288
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65327) - you deserved it (3609)

On 06/01/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by aarone23 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me while I was driving her to a surprise party where I was going to propose. FML

#16426904
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66299) - you deserved it (3828)

On 05/30/2011 at 10:58pm - love - by efff my life. - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to let me give her a foot massage after she had a long day at work. Halfway through, she fell asleep. Wanting to see how ticklish she actually was, I started to tickle her feet. She then kicked me straight in the nuts whilst sleeping. FML

Today, against my wishes, my family and I went swimming with sharks. While in the shark cage, a shark got within a few feet of us. My cowardly bowels objected and caused me to shit myself. FML

#16403007
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36969) - you deserved it (10403)

On 05/29/2011 at 2:22pm - animals - by Brie - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

#16399874
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60150) - you deserved it (12580)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of something I said 2 years ago, as a joke. I guess she took a while to get it. FML

#16395878
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41477) - you deserved it (7556)

On 05/29/2011 at 12:41am - love - by Username - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came home from work, only to find the babysitter passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's. At some point, it seems my son had taken the liberty of peeing on her while she slept. FML

#16375821
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37108) - you deserved it (5654)

On 05/27/2011 at 6:09pm - kids - by diddlebuag - United States (Ohio)

Today, my genius boyfriend was trying to remember a particular island in the Caribbean that was used by pirates in the past. I offered up Morocco. I heard him facepalm over the phone. FML

#16367949
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7771) - you deserved it (49296)

On 05/27/2011 at 1:46am - love - by Derp-A-Herp (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a firework show. In my kitchen. When my stove blew up. FML

#16364956
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30740) - you deserved it (3953)

On 05/26/2011 at 10:39pm - misc - by Username -

Today, I received a visit from a social worker. My son told his teacher I was starving him, all because I refused to let him eat pizza and ice cream for breakfast. FML

#16310426
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38956) - you deserved it (4098)

On 05/23/2011 at 7:58am - kids - by Bad Parent -

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36914) - you deserved it (6055)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32901) - you deserved it (20243)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32901) - you deserved it (20243)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)



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