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birdfreak

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birdfreak

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8456
  • Number of comments : 496
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About birdfreak : Stuff about me is supposed to go here, but I have nothing interesting to say...
Have a lovely day!

birdfreak's page activity

Visits<b>justanormalone</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 7:30am<b>mommy2cassidy</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 9:11pm<b>cheese7272</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 5:07pm<b>sspence</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 5:11pm<b>taintedtruffle</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 11:40pm<b>Franniee_</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 3:29pm<b>poncho55</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 2:26pm<b>abbythemuffin</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 7:00am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 9:35am<b>jesseb97</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 10:58pm<b>boobear19883</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 12:25am<b>singer0421</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 10:59pm<b>madmaddi147</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 8:23pm<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 1:08pm<b>auroxtra</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 2:46pm<b>Crusher74</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 9:23pm<b>nineteen99</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 12:45pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:18am

birdfreak's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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birdfreak's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

#20842823
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52135) - you deserved it (3121)

On 08/18/2013 at 5:37am - kids - by DrtySnchez - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was verbally abused by a customer at my job. Apparently, wearing "ugly, thick-framed hipster glasses as a fashion statement is a HUGE faux pas." These are my actual prescription glasses, and "faux pas" is not pronounced "fox paws". FML

#20840053
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42380) - you deserved it (3273)

On 08/16/2013 at 7:08am - misc - by hipster glasses - United States

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76106) - you deserved it (3704)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out my old DVD player is jealous of my Blu-ray player. It fell from the top of my closet and hit me in the head. FML

#20747890
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34503) - you deserved it (7027)

On 06/26/2013 at 2:57am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

#20724998
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73039) - you deserved it (7223)

On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was in the break room with my colleagues and our awful boss. As ever, he was talking trash, convinced that his jokes were actually funny. The window was open, and it was chilly. As he walked by it, I mangled my words and said, "Cedric, could you please shut your mouth?" FML

#20581032
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27929) - you deserved it (7187) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/08/2013 at 5:10pm - misc - by La Guigne - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML

#19758301
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15095) - you deserved it (40836)

On 06/09/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML

#19277345
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10490) - you deserved it (32120)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:11pm - misc - by zztopspinner (man) - United States

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

#18254436
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12542) - you deserved it (56901)

On 11/15/2011 at 10:16am - kids - by Margo (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my twin boys who are 5 decided to teach each other how to fly off the shed out back. They are still in their pajamas. Batman's arm is broken and Spiderman has a slight concussion. FML

#18022351
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32932) - you deserved it (6436)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:03am - kids - by optimistic2628 - United States

Today, I was given an entire week of detention for planking on my school desk. FML

#18008479
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14748) - you deserved it (72371)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:05pm - misc - by planking champion (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my wife showed me what was missing in our marriage with a Twilight video montage. FML

#17695562
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33919) - you deserved it (4198)

On 09/08/2011 at 8:52am - love - by I_dislike_Twilight (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

#17663371
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30283) - you deserved it (4062)

On 09/04/2011 at 6:10pm - misc - by ironic driver - United States (Texas)

Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML

#17206347
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41961) - you deserved it (10339)

On 07/21/2011 at 5:24pm - love - by toni405 - United States

Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML

#16950938
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10246) - you deserved it (43137)

On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)



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