birdfreak

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birdfreak

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 16511
  • Number of comments : 496
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About birdfreak : Stuff about me is supposed to go here, but I have nothing interesting to say...
Have a lovely day!

birdfreak's page activity

Visits<b>sometimefml</b> - the 08/20/2016 at 11:13pm<b>metal1245</b> - the 08/11/2016 at 10:25pm<b>AudiLover21</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 3:02pm<b>misspeach13</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 2:03am<b>Survii</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 3:32am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 12:51pm<b>KappaTrappa</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 7:43am<b>Niz_DD</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 4:41am<b>dextrementor</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 11:43pm<b>jill97</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 9:27am<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 4:08pm<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 10:31pm<b>MonstreBelle</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 11:40pm<b>liv1222</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 1:49pm<b>deitcocaine</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 3:11pm<b>dontmindme7</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 10:21pm<b>ahmad163</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 8:16pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:57pm

Fucked!<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 11:57pm

birdfreak's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of birdfreak's badges

birdfreak's favorite FMLs

Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm / New Zealand / Kids

Today, the man I have been in love with for years came to me with a beautiful ring and a heartfelt proposal. Too bad it ended with an eager, "So do you think he'll say yes?" FML

by rabidfairy / 08/12/2014 at 10:04pm / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

by jake / 08/12/2014 at 6:21am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

by jake / 08/12/2014 at 6:21am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

by marcranger / 08/11/2014 at 7:40pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

by jackie89 / 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Intimacy

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2014 at 9:31am / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, my elderly mother explained that, "I don't need my glasses to drive, I just need them to see." FML

by scared / 08/03/2014 at 8:47pm / Canada / Transportation

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2014 at 1:16am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

by whoops / 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I confided to my grandma that I'm suffering from depression and I feel like a burden to everyone. She replied that her grandpa used to suffer from depression too, but that he'd cured himself in the end, namely by committing suicide. Thanks, grandma, thanks. FML

by lacieQ / 08/01/2014 at 4:09pm / Canada / Health

Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating a donut. Let's just say the officer didn't appreciate being offered one. FML

by fatty magoo / 07/29/2014 at 2:20pm / United States (Washington) / Transportation

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend, because he's too manipulative. By the time our chat ended, instead of being single, I'm somehow now committed to going on vacation with him and his family. FML

by whatjusthappened / 07/21/2014 at 11:58am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

by Pandamomma / 07/21/2014 at 8:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML

by happypineapple / 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm / Australia (Queensland) / Animals