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birdfreak

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birdfreak

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8106
  • Number of comments : 496
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About birdfreak : Stuff about me is supposed to go here, but I have nothing interesting to say...
Have a lovely day!

birdfreak's page activity

Visits<b>taintedtruffle</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 11:40pm<b>Franniee_</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 3:29pm<b>poncho55</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 2:26pm<b>abbythemuffin</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 7:00am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 9:35am<b>jesseb97</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 10:58pm<b>boobear19883</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 12:25am<b>singer0421</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 10:59pm<b>madmaddi147</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 8:23pm<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 1:08pm<b>auroxtra</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 2:46pm<b>Crusher74</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 9:23pm<b>nineteen99</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 12:45pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:18am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 10:44am<b>ares99</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 4:06pm<b>masonthemidget</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 4:42pm<b>ortega0607</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 11:21pm

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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birdfreak's favorite FMLs

Today, my elderly mother explained that, "I don't need my glasses to drive, I just need them to see." FML

#21228755
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35156) - you deserved it (2504)

On 08/03/2014 at 8:47pm - misc - by scared - Canada

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49125) - you deserved it (21239)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

#21226906
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33874) - you deserved it (22529)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm - misc - by whoops (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I confided to my grandma that I'm suffering from depression and I feel like a burden to everyone. She replied that her grandpa used to suffer from depression too, but that he'd cured himself in the end, namely by committing suicide. Thanks, grandma, thanks. FML

#21226890
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39434) - you deserved it (3555)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:09pm - health - by lacieQ (woman) - Canada

Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating a donut. Let's just say the officer didn't appreciate being offered one. FML

#21223797
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39677) - you deserved it (13870)

On 07/29/2014 at 2:20pm - misc - by fatty magoo - United States (Washington)

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend, because he's too manipulative. By the time our chat ended, instead of being single, I'm somehow now committed to going on vacation with him and his family. FML

#21216217
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44184) - you deserved it (13439)

On 07/21/2014 at 11:58am - love - by whatjusthappened - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML

#21211381
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36201) - you deserved it (17571)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm - misc - by happypineapple - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I babysat a 9-year-old kid for the first time. The moment his parents left the house, the little shit looked me dead in the eyes and let me know that if I didn't let him do whatever he wanted, he'd tell his parents that I touched him in his "no-no place". Suddenly I hate kids. FML

#21210892
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51379) - you deserved it (3570)

On 07/16/2014 at 2:56pm - kids - by fuck you, kid (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

#21207158
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42406) - you deserved it (7007)

On 07/12/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was interviewing a woman for a job. She told me that she may need days off because of her artistic son. I jokingly replied, "Does he color on the walls or something?" She then stared at me with a weird look on her face. Autistic, her son is autistic. FML

#21205262
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37945) - you deserved it (19651)

On 07/10/2014 at 6:17pm - work - by dammit hearing aid - United States (Iowa)

Today, I went on a job interview. The interviewer said it all went well, but he can't hire me because I've got a nose piercing, and that type of "image" isn't the kind they're looking for in their employees. This is the guy who had a full sleeve tattoo. FML

#21200605
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43106) - you deserved it (7162)

On 07/06/2014 at 2:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my little sister started freaking out, because she was playing with some white-out eraser and got some on her finger. She started crying inconsolably because she thought her entire finger was going to disappear. FML

#21198613
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38880) - you deserved it (4127)

On 07/04/2014 at 3:41pm - kids - by neryc (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42954) - you deserved it (6130)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I'm a college student working at Dollar Tree. The signs hanging every 10 ft, plastered on every box, every wall, every corner, say "Everything's $1." Someone asked me how much something was, because there was no price tag. This happens multiple times a day. FML

#21189564
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44516) - you deserved it (4368)

On 06/26/2014 at 8:07pm - work - by E.B. (woman) - United States (Mississippi)



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  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

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