About bigbadtim : Meh
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Today, the Jehovah's Witnesses witnessed me whacking off on my couch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18442) - you deserved it (10354)
On 06/19/2012 at 11:35am - intimacy - by megasniper240 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I tried to convince my daughter that the "To boldly go where no man has gone before" speech is from Star Trek, and is not an actual historical speech by the first man on the moon. She has decided to include it in her university essay on Neil Armstrong anyway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16155) - you deserved it (2503)
On 04/12/2012 at 2:49pm - misc - by Ameel (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I had a dream about the damn cappuccino machine at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14363) - you deserved it (2413)
On 02/26/2012 at 9:43pm - misc - by slickrick22 (man) - United States
Today, I had a dream about the damn cappuccino machine at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14363) - you deserved it (2413)
On 02/26/2012 at 9:43pm - misc - by slickrick22 (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend showed me a YouTube video of him popping a huge blackhead on his forehead. He told me he had been "growing" it for more than 2 years now. I have been caressing and kissing that thing for almost 2 years because I thought it was a beauty mark. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25307) - you deserved it (10742)
On 09/26/2011 at 12:58pm - misc - by Yuuucky (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my dad shaved his head. This wouldn't be so bad if he didn't expect me to address him as "Captain Picard" 24/7 now. He won't answer me otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17774) - you deserved it (2614)
On 08/08/2011 at 10:12am - misc - by MissArizona (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was dared to eat durian. With my reputation hanging in the balance, I bought one. Only after I opened it did I realize the extent of the dare. It smelled and tasted like dried cat shit that Satan himself had regurgitated. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8736) - you deserved it (27777)
On 07/24/2011 at 5:01pm - misc - by cadillacfrank - United States
Today, against my wishes, my family and I went swimming with sharks. While in the shark cage, a shark got within a few feet of us. My cowardly bowels objected and caused me to shit myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30813) - you deserved it (7858)
On 05/29/2011 at 2:22pm - animals - by Brie - United States
Today, I went on a date with a woman. She brought along her stuffed rabbit, and introduced us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32875) - you deserved it (4071)
On 04/26/2011 at 8:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Israel
Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42174) - you deserved it (4476)
On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -
Today, I freaked out when the remote wouldn't unlock my car. I stood in the rain trying to open the door. Unsure of what to do next, I called my boyfriend. He told me to "put the key in the door". I had forgotten about that option. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6754) - you deserved it (46684)
On 04/13/2011 at 5:44pm - misc - by andimanastudent (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was talking to a guy on the phone. I told him I'd be right back. I thought I'd put him on mute. Turns out he heard everything as I took the biggest dump I've ever taken. We haven't talked since. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11408) - you deserved it (29581)
On 04/08/2011 at 1:31am - love - by Payte -
TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30152) - you deserved it (24878)
On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, two guys broke into my apartment to rob me at gunpoint. While I was wanking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51121) - you deserved it (9744)
On 12/01/2010 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I discovered my boyfriend's family approves of me, not because I'm friendly and intelligent, but because I'm an adequate addition to their gene pool. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15950) - you deserved it (2872)
On 10/15/2010 at 12:40pm - misc - by nick92 (woman) - United States (New York)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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