bewer415

Search for a member

Offline (the 12/27/2014 at 8:47am)

bewer415

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 April 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6184
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About bewer415 : Love meeting new people

bewer415's page activity

Visits<b>x_the_lancer_x</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 11:57pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 7:59pm<b>acidicthinking</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 11:46am<b>rachelcasper</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 4:52am<b>klimrod89</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 9:04am<b>DoubleDie7</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 4:44am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 12:55pm<b>nancy_ydg17</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 2:11am<b>jaffvis</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 4:27pm<b>zeropointnine</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 4:27pm<b>theawkwardlife</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 6:47pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 11:21pm<b>olpally</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 5:35pm

bewer415's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of bewer415's badges

bewer415's favorite FMLs

Today, I was called in over speakers at the airport. The man who was speaking clearly and nearly burst out laughing when he said my name. Soon, a few people around also snickered when they heard it. I had to wait five minutes before I could casually stand up. My last name is Bastard. FML

by poorbastard / 08/30/2014 at 4:35am / Canada (Quebec) / Transportation

Today, it was my great aunt's funeral. We all had to wait two hours for the service to begin, because they forgot to dig the grave. FML

by abbshows / 08/29/2014 at 2:54pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

by That idiot / 08/27/2014 at 10:33pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids

Today, I finally told my dad that I hate his girlfriend. I said her daughter's a complete whore, and her son is annoying as fuck. Turns out they were in the house and within earshot, ready to throw me a birthday party. FML

by Anonymous / 08/22/2014 at 6:18pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was so desperately lonely that I begged a telemarketer not to hang up on me. FML

by lonely loser / 08/22/2014 at 2:04pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I was excited to receive a rejection letter, because this was the first company to even acknowledge that I sent them a resume. FML

by Beeky / 08/22/2014 at 9:14am / United States (Montana) / Work

Today, I had some painful gas at work, so I tried to silently ease it out. It was silent all right; silent, and so deadly that someone exclaimed, "What the fuck?!" My coworkers traced it back to me. Now they're all pointing their mini desk fans in my direction to make a point. FML

by Anonymous / 08/19/2014 at 5:54pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

by embarrassed / 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

by Degueusement / 08/18/2014 at 12:48am / Intimacy

Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML

by ugh thanks / 08/17/2014 at 12:40pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

by not a dick-man / 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

by jake / 08/12/2014 at 6:21am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

by WickedRene / 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I confided to my grandma that I'm suffering from depression and I feel like a burden to everyone. She replied that her grandpa used to suffer from depression too, but that he'd cured himself in the end, namely by committing suicide. Thanks, grandma, thanks. FML

by lacieQ / 08/01/2014 at 4:09pm / Canada / Health

Today, I was waiting in a line, texting on my phone. I hear what sounded like a sneeze and said, "Bless you" to the man in front of me. He gave me a dirty look as I began to smell something awful. It wasn't a sneeze. FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2014 at 10:49pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous