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bethan1's favorite FMLs
by Cheerieful / 05/07/2011 at 12:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML
by Anon / 05/07/2011 at 2:08am / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Intimacy
Today, at 2 in the morning, my water broke. I called my mom and woke her up to come watch our older kid, while my husband and I went to the hospital. After being tested at the hospital, I was told I had just peed myself. FML
by Anonymous / 05/07/2011 at 1:58am / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, I stubbed my toe against the corner of my bed, causing me to gasp and moan in pain. My parents overheard, and now I'm getting the full coming of age talk and how I shouldn't lie about what I was doing. I didn't do anything. FML
by Anonymous / 05/06/2011 at 8:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by liynda / 05/05/2011 at 9:49pm / Canada / Miscellaneous
by Monika / 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
Today, I was so sick that I was puking and had the runs. While on the toilet, I yelled for my boyfriend to get me a bowl to puke in. As I did so, I saw that a ton of it was forming on the floor in dots. My boyfriend had given me a spaghetti strainer. FML
by megomania / 05/02/2011 at 9:51am / United States (North Carolina) / Health
by suckishbf / 04/27/2011 at 10:41pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
by Anonymous / 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by Username / 04/26/2011 at 3:11pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/26/2011 at 9:56am / United Kingdom (London) / Health
Today, while buying groceries, I noticed that the lady in front of me had left a box behind. I grabbed the box and ran out the door after her. After turning around to find three employees chasing me, I noticed I had just stolen the donation box. FML
by magicman / 04/26/2011 at 12:45am / Canada (British Columbia) / Money
Today, my husband and I had the grand opening to our new winery. We had a big sign out front saying "FREE GRAPES", to try and get more people interested. People kept giving us dirty looks when passing. We later realized there was something covering the "G". FML
by Anonymous / 04/24/2011 at 12:10am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by bobo / 04/23/2011 at 9:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
- Today while walking to the shop under the blistering African sun, I stepped on something that stuck… Today, my bike brakes failed as I was going downhill. I ended up running a light and hit a car at… Today, I was complaining to a coworker about how my manager had changed my schedule without telling…