Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

besosforme

Online | Search for a member

besosforme

50Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3837
  • Number of comments : 77
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 3 posted

About besosforme : Most of my favorite people on this site seem to have disappeared in the last 5+ years. =[
I know that if the actual FMLs don't make me laugh, the commenters definitely will. My favorites (some no longer with us, sadly) are: pendatik, DocBastard, TheIrishJaneDoe, perdix, every1luvsboners, RedPillSucks, KaySL, and occasionally, Freeze. There are a few others, but these members never fail to make me laugh, or want to thank them for being the (only) voice of reason in the comment threads.
I may not always have perfect grammar because I'm usually accessing this website on my phone, so I guess I can't be a true Grammar Nazi- but I appreciate those who are. You can call me "besos" or "BFM", or anything along that avenue. Gracias =] Happy FML-ing!

besosforme's page activity

Visits<b>khoov19</b> - 28 minutes ago<b>Whiplash169</b> - 3 hours ago<b>Earthdforce</b> - 14 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - 14 hours ago<b>HighasaCloud</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Sethan01</b> - yesterday at 4:46am<b>ramthegod</b> - yesterday at 2:04am<b>allyboss78</b> - yesterday at 10:32pm<b>dk1991</b> - yesterday at 11:34am<b>montanab</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 7:19am<b>cyborghinge</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 4:38am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 12:41am<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:32pm<b>spookyboy</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 5:55pm<b>euphoricraccoon</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 4:32pm<b>xtg14x</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:38pm<b>dd94</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 12:11pm<b>sam6_009</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 3:32am

Liked!<b>khoov19</b> - 4 hours ago<b>Dustmop</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 11:28am<b>moneylessrc</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 5:18am<b>Welshite</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 6:16pm<b>slender_gab</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 3:44am<b>JayVicious</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 2:55am<b>badmandilon</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 1:23pm<b>sam6_009</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 7:40pm<b>Baustigt</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 7:53am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:34pm<b>ceelos97</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 7:47am<b>Frenchtony</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:34am<b>Bradenheck</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 8:58pm<b>James_is_Mexican</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 8:49pm<b>lovecottoncandy</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 7:51pm<b>morondon000</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 6:04pm<b>Afroninja4566</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 4:32pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 12:46pm

besosforme's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Follow up

You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

See all of besosforme's badges

besosforme's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend had to give me an enema. FML

#14700960
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20352) - you deserved it (3821)

On 01/24/2011 at 7:30pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17485) - you deserved it (43081) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

#14613104
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34176) - you deserved it (5800) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 11:44am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Switzerland - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40878) - you deserved it (26883) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my boyfriend sent me a picture of his morning dump because it was heart-shaped. FML

#14608701
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32860) - you deserved it (5726) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML

#14608705
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30868) - you deserved it (19964) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, two guys broke into my apartment to rob me at gunpoint. While I was wanking. FML

#14043132
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58276) - you deserved it (10604)

On 12/01/2010 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I managed to not think too much about how alone I feel living in a strange city, and I went out to find a quiet place to write and eat. After I ordered my meal, I saw that I was the only diner that was sitting alone at a table. Then 'All By Myself' came on the radio. FML

#14040843
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31903) - you deserved it (3262)

On 11/30/2010 at 9:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - Italy

Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML

Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML

#13912441
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23914) - you deserved it (6602)

On 11/20/2010 at 2:07pm - kids - by Lexi - Canada

Today, my wife and I had one of the biggest arguments we've ever had, which resulted in her leaving, going to her parents' house and calling me twice, screaming and sobbing. The argument was over a seven dollar bottle of wine. Apparently, she was "saving it for a special occasion." FML

#13857335
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28992) - you deserved it (4674)

On 11/15/2010 at 9:02pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I changed my phone number because my old one belonged to a prostitute. My new one belongs to a debtor. FML

#13835312
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24853) - you deserved it (2559)

On 11/14/2010 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realised I haven't had a date in so long that I actually seriously considered meeting someone from online, purely based on the fact he could spell properly. FML

#13822904
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20846) - you deserved it (3675)

On 11/13/2010 at 1:09am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was writing my narrative essay for my English class. When I turned it in, I was really proud of what I thought I wrote. Evidently for some people listening to music while writing essays is a bad thing. My essay was filled with little bits of ZZ Top lyrics. FML

#13784109
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6406) - you deserved it (29685)

On 11/09/2010 at 11:00pm - work - by hwscrewed - United States (Texas)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: