Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

besosforme

Offline (46 minutes ago) | Search for a member

besosforme

132Fucked!

besosformebesosforme
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5220
  • Number of comments : 84
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 4 posted

About besosforme : Most of my favorite people on this site seem to have disappeared in the last 5+ years. =[
I know that if the actual FMLs don't make me laugh, the commenters definitely will. My favorites (some no longer with us, sadly) are: pendatik, DocBastard, TheIrishJaneDoe, perdix, every1luvsboners, RedPillSucks, KaySL, and occasionally, Freeze. There are a few others, but these members never fail to make me laugh, or want to thank them for being the (only) voice of reason in the comment threads.
I may not always have perfect grammar because I'm usually accessing this website on my phone, so I guess I can't be a true Grammar Nazi- but I appreciate those who are. You can call me "besos" or "BFM", or anything along that avenue. Gracias =] Happy FML-ing!

besosforme's page activity

Visits<b>thatguy240</b> - yesterday at 1:24pm<b>FlendtDK</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 10:39am<b>klutz44</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 9:01pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 12:36am<b>sadistmonkey</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 2:16pm<b>jaysander_r</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 9:53am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 5:01pm<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 1:56pm<b>olpally</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 10:47am<b>NodakN8V</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:46pm<b>balboa_2</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 4:42pm<b>ronenlior</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 7:56am<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 5:57pm<b>hussamhasi</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 5:33pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 5:19pm<b>Twill3422</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 3:17am<b>lola4455</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 11:02pm<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 1:14pm

Fucked!<b>FlendtDK</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 4:39pm<b>ronenlior</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 1:57pm<b>olpally</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 7:44am<b>WOTAN1488</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 12:30pm<b>Dingodile</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 10:12pm<b>thatoneguy1111</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 8:29pm<b>xxjeramiahxx</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 4:00am<b>balboa_2</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 10:28am<b>whitetiger13131</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 5:15am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 5:32pm<b>Thenextguyover</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 4:05pm<b>brandonwong</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 8:56am<b>Toonice45</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 8:22am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 7:45pm<b>IamHercules</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 7:07pm<b>sbarua219</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 9:31am<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 9:08am<b>Jayroc</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 5:16am

besosforme's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of besosforme's badges

besosforme's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized my tampon goes deeper than my boyfriend. FML

#17786255
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53401) - you deserved it (6372)

On 09/20/2011 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Cantgetno (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I spent thirty minutes in the shower trying to remove "Pierre", a face complete with moustache that my girlfriend drew in sharpie on the tip of my cock. FML

#17628880
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28845) - you deserved it (10554)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML

#17352313
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43791) - you deserved it (5787)

On 08/03/2011 at 3:40am - love - by Tim - United States

Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML

#17352313
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43791) - you deserved it (5787)

On 08/03/2011 at 3:40am - love - by Tim - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51318) - you deserved it (8167)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, I walked in on my father and brother attempting to harmonize their farts. FML

#17109341
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31210) - you deserved it (5266)

On 07/14/2011 at 4:09pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

#16576766
338 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37842) - you deserved it (16398)

On 06/09/2011 at 11:04am - health - by wtf - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37177) - you deserved it (6077)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up so pissed off that I yelled at my cereal. FML

#16128268
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33877) - you deserved it (14923)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting with my crush at lunch. Trying to flirt, I tried to stare seductively into his eyes while sucking on my straw. I missed. The straw shot straight up my nose, causing me the worst nose bleed of my life. FML

#16074104
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18430) - you deserved it (41492)

On 05/07/2011 at 12:46am - love - by littlegirl - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went on a long overdue vacation to France with my husband and young daughter. As revenge for an earlier prank, my sister has apparently taught my daughter to swear profusely in French. FML

#16068567
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29052) - you deserved it (8887)

On 05/06/2011 at 3:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead)

Today, I spent almost two hours cleaning my fish tank, only to find out that my cat had secretly eaten all of my fish while I was cleaning the tank. FML

#15309054
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35427) - you deserved it (7895)

On 03/14/2011 at 3:52pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML

#14967873
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8761) - you deserved it (49262)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:31am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

#14849779
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52345) - you deserved it (3841)

On 02/05/2011 at 7:02am - misc - by bob - United States (Arizona)

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML

#14838014
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68633) - you deserved it (6296)

On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -



FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #17
  • It's here! Yep, time once more to delve into the darkest corners of the FML postbag and check out the stuff that never would've seen the light of day, had we not had a vicious streak in our brains. It's…

Tuesday 25 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: