Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

besosforme

Offline (12 hours ago) | Search for a member

besosforme

134Fucked!

besosformebesosforme
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5242
  • Number of comments : 85
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 4 posted

About besosforme : Most of my favorite people on this site seem to have disappeared in the last 5+ years. =[
I know that if the actual FMLs don't make me laugh, the commenters definitely will. My favorites (some no longer with us, sadly) are: pendatik, DocBastard, TheIrishJaneDoe, perdix, every1luvsboners, RedPillSucks, KaySL, and occasionally, Freeze. There are a few others, but these members never fail to make me laugh, or want to thank them for being the (only) voice of reason in the comment threads.
I may not always have perfect grammar because I'm usually accessing this website on my phone, so I guess I can't be a true Grammar Nazi- but I appreciate those who are. You can call me "besos" or "BFM", or anything along that avenue. Gracias =] Happy FML-ing!

besosforme's page activity

Visits<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - 3 hours ago<b>DumbWater</b> - 5 hours ago<b>arides18</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Shuff52</b> - 16 hours ago<b>CaptainSmith28</b> - 17 hours ago<b>Mons</b> - 17 hours ago<b>PaigeLeeAnn11</b> - 17 hours ago<b>DOMEinic</b> - 18 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - 18 hours ago<b>MetalxSoldier</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 4:25am<b>Ian_from_0070</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 11:17am<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 7:52pm<b>thatguy240</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 1:24pm<b>FlendtDK</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 10:39am<b>klutz44</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 9:01pm<b>sadistmonkey</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 2:16pm<b>jaysander_r</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 9:53am<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 1:56pm

Fucked!<b>Shuff52</b> - 10 hours ago<b>CaptainSmith28</b> - 11 hours ago<b>FlendtDK</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 4:39pm<b>ronenlior</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 1:57pm<b>olpally</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 7:44am<b>WOTAN1488</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 12:30pm<b>Dingodile</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 10:12pm<b>thatoneguy1111</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 8:29pm<b>xxjeramiahxx</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 4:00am<b>balboa_2</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 10:28am<b>whitetiger13131</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 5:15am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 5:32pm<b>Thenextguyover</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 4:05pm<b>brandonwong</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 8:56am<b>Toonice45</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 8:22am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 7:45pm<b>IamHercules</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 7:07pm<b>sbarua219</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 9:31am

besosforme's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of besosforme's badges

besosforme's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a grocery store with my great-grandmother. It would've been nice to know she hadn't taken her medication before she started beating the cashier with her umbrella. FML

#19098452
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23690) - you deserved it (2065)

On 02/17/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that the pool boy has been stealing from me for over a year now. The latest things that he has taken are my laptop, the cash I hide in my closet and my wife. FML

#19092869
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39702) - you deserved it (4001)

On 02/16/2012 at 11:26am - misc - by mypoolisstilldirty (man) - Australia

Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML

#19088946
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15903) - you deserved it (29361)

On 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, someone peed in my physical education locker. The only way someone could've done it is with a ladder. I'm so popular it hurts. FML

#19084261
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26411) - you deserved it (4856)

On 02/15/2012 at 7:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

#19072659
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37542) - you deserved it (2850)

On 02/14/2012 at 9:29am - love - by Illinoisgirl - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, my friend's kid chased me with a rusty, sharp tent peg and threatened to kill me. When I finally got him to calm down he ran off to his room. Later, I found the tent peg under his pillow with a note that said my name. My friend thinks it's hilarious. I am staying here for a week. FML

#19046933
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29451) - you deserved it (2236)

On 02/11/2012 at 8:41am - kids - by FuckLife (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was invited over by my girlfriend's parents, but I couldn't bring myself to take part in their discussions. During a lull in conversation, I noticed everyone was staring at me. Covering myself while I tried to think of something to say, I grabbed an apple and took a bite. It was plastic. FML

#19035452
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30080) - you deserved it (9219) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/09/2012 at 5:11pm - misc - by Bonapp - France

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

#18981474
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16723) - you deserved it (23986)

On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
217 comments

Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my nipple. FML

#18533505
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31581) - you deserved it (9266)

On 12/17/2011 at 2:59am - misc - by MikeNick - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him for the first time. His response was to smile and pat me on the head. FML

#18533113
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30297) - you deserved it (4712)

On 12/17/2011 at 1:49am - love - by teejayrn - United States

Today, I'll be sleeping in my car for umpteenth time this year, because my psychotic wife is again convinced that I'm sleeping with practically every woman in my state. I'm too broke to pay for a divorce, and too embarrassed to go to a friend's house. FML

#18531545
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34216) - you deserved it (5589)

On 12/16/2011 at 10:29pm - love - by agony (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML

#18525865
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28748) - you deserved it (13524)

On 12/16/2011 at 4:08am - kids - by Oily (man) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, stepping on a scale for the first time in years, I had to lift up my stomach to see the number. FML

#18520794
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12862) - you deserved it (40851)

On 12/15/2011 at 4:52pm - health - by ms piggy - United States

Today, I heard my alarm go off, dragged myself out of bed, had breakfast and got ready for work. As I was heading out the door I checked the time again. It was 1:41 AM. Apparently my alarm never actually went off. FML

#18520175
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33148) - you deserved it (5691)

On 12/15/2011 at 3:12pm - misc - by 2285morgan - United States



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: