bertiebass1

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bertiebass1

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 January 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4358
  • Number of comments : 16
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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bertiebass1's page activity

Visits<b>DoubleSoul</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 3:53pm<b>jordanwilbanks</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 9:11am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 11:35pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 11:28pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 10:02am<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 6:31pm<b>CeizMac13</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 12:33pm<b>rjc490</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 2:02pm<b>ghosthuggers</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 6:21pm<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 7:55pm<b>Carrotop12</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 10:36pm<b>Tigre5012</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 12:47pm<b>JRT1393</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 12:35am<b>angeloshaheen</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 3:41pm<b>Superdouchebag</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 6:03pm<b>missmandersxoxo</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 3:10pm<b>sammyb1998</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 1:02am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 11:47pm

Fucked!<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 12:32am<b>rjc490</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 8:03pm

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bertiebass1's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

by Dunzo15 / 05/02/2009 at 2:28am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I was walking downstairs to the subway. At the top of the stairs this hobo was peeing. Two seconds before, I told my friend I felt rain. It wasn't rain. FML

by DudeManBro69 / 05/01/2009 at 9:15am / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I was walking downstairs to the subway. At the top of the stairs this hobo was peeing. Two seconds before, I told my friend I felt rain. It wasn't rain. FML

by DudeManBro69 / 05/01/2009 at 9:15am / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, my family was talking about how people's hair goes gray when they get old. My grandma mentioned that she was initially attracted to my grandpa because of his red hair and was sad when it turned gray. "It's ok," she continued, "his pubic hair is still red." FML

by ewwww / 04/27/2009 at 12:08am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was washing the dishes, I felt what I thought was a mosquito on my leg. I kicked at it with my foot only to realize that I had just kicked my adopted puppy in the face. Now, whenever I come into a room, he runs to the corner and pees. FML

by Anonymousagb / 04/24/2009 at 11:18am / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Animals

Today, my son and I were on an airplane playing "I Spy" to pass the time. The game went back and forth a few times when my son said, "I spy something yellow." After pointing out numerous yellow objects on the plane I gave up. He said, "Daddy! It's your teeth!" FML

by WTF / 04/22/2009 at 3:46pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Kids

Today, I went on somewhat of a blind date. The date was OK until he tried to spoon feed me. This didn't go over so well. Later, I noticed a strange looking brief case he was carrying. I asked him what it was and he whipped out 5 yoyos and did a yoyo show in the middle of the restaurant. FML

by 11321 / 04/22/2009 at 1:24am / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I was playing and laughing with my new baby boy. He was giggling, and it was adorable. Out of nowhere I say "you're my favorite!". Now I'm sitting here talking to my two other children about how what I said earlier I didn't mean personally. They never want to talk to me again. FML

by Damnlife123 / 04/20/2009 at 10:39pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, I tried to sneak up on my girlfriend who was sitting in her car with one of her girlfriends. I snuck up to the driver's side window and tried to startle her by banging on the window. The window was down. My thumb went right in her eye. She has to wear a patch for 2 weeks. FML

by shiftybizniss / 04/16/2009 at 2:43pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my family and I ran into an older man my parents knew. He continually asked me questions like do you play football, have you started shaving yet, etc. I thought he was joking. He told my parents I had grown into quite a young man. I am a girl and he wasn't joking. FML

by yellow_sunflowers101 / 04/16/2009 at 12:53pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breaths on my neck. When I was about to finish he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck/ear and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

by bodyelectric / 04/13/2009 at 8:07am / United States / Intimacy

Today, it was easter and I thought it might be fun to look for eggs with my little brother. My parents told me to take the ones in the higher places that my brother couldn't reach. All of his eggs were filled with candy or money. Each one of mine had a note saying 'maybe when you lose weight'. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2009 at 11:22am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, a woman drove through my house. She was texting and eating watermelon at the same time. I didn't know that was even possible, but now my house is condemned. FML

by Fitz / 04/12/2009 at 9:53am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, me and my boyfriend were telling eachother secrets and I told him i've shaved my upper lip. He said "I know, it's prickly when we make out." FML

by Anonymous / 04/06/2009 at 5:50pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy