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Today, I overheard my dad's friend complaining to my dad that his new baby boy is a ginger. I continued listening, and heard my dad saying, "Yeah, there's nothing worse than having a ginger." I'm his daughter. I'm a ginger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50592) - you deserved it (5897)
On 05/03/2009 at 12:40pm - misc - by Deirbhile (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my 6 year old granddaughter was sitting on my lap playing with the rings on my fingers. After a moment, she pointed to a gold ring with many jewels and said, "When you die can I have that one?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (50521) - you deserved it (2801)
On 05/03/2009 at 12:16am - kids - by itswhateverr (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me, "what would happen to me if you and daddy died?". I told her that she'd probably live with her Uncle Ant and Aunt Ilene. She looked at me and said "You guys can die. I won't cry. I get everything I want over there." FML
I agree, your life sucks (79145) - you deserved it (6704)
On 05/02/2009 at 4:12am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML
I agree, your life sucks (140429) - you deserved it (32111)
On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was walking downstairs to the subway. At the top of the stairs this hobo was peeing. Two seconds before, I told my friend I felt rain. It wasn't rain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49028) - you deserved it (2224)
On 05/01/2009 at 9:15am - misc - by DudeManBro69 (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was walking downstairs to the subway. At the top of the stairs this hobo was peeing. Two seconds before, I told my friend I felt rain. It wasn't rain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49028) - you deserved it (2224)
On 05/01/2009 at 9:15am - misc - by DudeManBro69 (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my family was talking about how people's hair goes gray when they get old. My grandma mentioned that she was initially attracted to my grandpa because of his red hair and was sad when it turned gray. "It's ok," she continued, "his pubic hair is still red." FML
I agree, your life sucks (59533) - you deserved it (3218)
On 04/27/2009 at 12:08am - misc - by ewwww (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, as I was washing the dishes, I felt what I thought was a mosquito on my leg. I kicked at it with my foot only to realize that I had just kicked my adopted puppy in the face. Now, whenever I come into a room, he runs to the corner and pees. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20838) - you deserved it (65931)
On 04/24/2009 at 11:18am - animals - by Anonymousagb (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)
Today, my son and I were on an airplane playing "I Spy" to pass the time. The game went back and forth a few times when my son said, "I spy something yellow." After pointing out numerous yellow objects on the plane I gave up. He said, "Daddy! It's your teeth!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (44254) - you deserved it (13299)
On 04/22/2009 at 3:46pm - kids - by WTF (man) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I went on somewhat of a blind date. The date was OK until he tried to spoon feed me. This didn't go over so well. Later, I noticed a strange looking brief case he was carrying. I asked him what it was and he whipped out 5 yoyos and did a yoyo show in the middle of the restaurant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52247) - you deserved it (4636)
On 04/22/2009 at 1:24am - misc - by 11321 (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was playing and laughing with my new baby boy. He was giggling, and it was adorable. Out of nowhere I say "you're my favorite!". Now I'm sitting here talking to my two other children about how what I said earlier I didn't mean personally. They never want to talk to me again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11357) - you deserved it (101795)
On 04/20/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by Damnlife123 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I tried to sneak up on my girlfriend who was sitting in her car with one of her girlfriends. I snuck up to the driver's side window and tried to startle her by banging on the window. The window was down. My thumb went right in her eye. She has to wear a patch for 2 weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10961) - you deserved it (50419)
On 04/16/2009 at 2:43pm - misc - by shiftybizniss - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my family and I ran into a older man my parents knew. He counitinually asked me questions like do you play football, have you started shaving yet, etc. I thought he was joking. He told my parents I had grown into quite a young man. I am a girl and he wasn't joking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62739) - you deserved it (3671)
On 04/16/2009 at 12:53pm - misc - by yellow_sunflowers101 (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breaths on my neck. When I was about to finish he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck/ear and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML
I agree, your life sucks (88181) - you deserved it (6565)
On 04/13/2009 at 8:07am - intimacy - by bodyelectric (woman) - United States
Today, it was easter and I thought it might be fun to look for eggs with my little brother. My parents told me to take the ones in the higher places that my brother couldn't reach. All of his eggs were filled with candy or money. Each one of mine had a note saying 'maybe when you lose weight'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59597) - you deserved it (6911)
On 04/12/2009 at 11:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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