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benneth002

Offline (the 10/23/2014 at 2:09pm) | Search for a member

benneth002

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  • Number of visits : 354
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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benneth002's page activity

Visits<b>ozpunker</b> - the 03/16/2013 at 7:54pm

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benneth002's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the gym, when I saw my uncle at the front desk. I quietly went up behind him and slapped him hard on the back while yelling "What's up, loser?!" He turned around. It wasn't my uncle. FML

#21198479
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25286) - you deserved it (38593)

On 07/04/2014 at 1:35pm - misc - by Oops - United States

Today, my 6-year-old brother showed me the "books" he's been writing for the past week. My parents, who are first-generation immigrants, want him to take the books to school to show everyone. My only problem with this? The main character's name is "Wanker". FML

#21195314
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36090) - you deserved it (3247)

On 07/01/2014 at 5:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my grandma got a new boyfriend. She dumped the old one because "His wife was taking too long to die." FML

#21195046
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49839) - you deserved it (4167)

On 07/01/2014 at 1:31pm - love - by carebear1228 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56061) - you deserved it (5197) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I smacked my kid on top of the head for spinning the display rack while I was looking at greeting cards. It wasn't until he dramatically screamed and dropped to the floor wailing that I realized he wasn't my daughter. FML

#21194154
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28813) - you deserved it (42140)

On 06/30/2014 at 7:39pm - kids - by BaWanda (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I sped off down the road, then realized to my horror that my cat was clinging to the roof of the car. FML

Today, I found out that the lump under my carpet that I stomped on to flatten was actually a dead frog that had gotten caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. FML

#21192954
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40126) - you deserved it (6469)

On 06/29/2014 at 9:05pm - misc - by Unknown - United States

Today, two months after forgiving my girlfriend for breaking my heart by cheating on me, I found out that she's cheating again with the same guy. When I confronted her, she basically said I brought it on myself and that I was an idiot for not dumping her the first time. FML

#21191426
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42812) - you deserved it (23111)

On 06/28/2014 at 11:48am - love - by lovegame (man) - Singapore

Today, I put on some sexy lingerie, ready to have some fun with my husband. I found him in the living room, opening a bag of doritos in front of the TV. He saw me and understood. Then he looked back at the doritos, then back at me and said gravely, "No way, babe. No way." FML

#21190698
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51481) - you deserved it (6610)

On 06/27/2014 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42955) - you deserved it (6130)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took my clothes off for a shower at an RV campsite. I started running the water when I noticed there was a pack of hornets in the bathroom. I stood there, stark naked, waiting for a chance to get out, for four hours. FML

#21184935
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38642) - you deserved it (5082)

On 06/23/2014 at 1:41am - animals - by callmeclarence - United States (California)

Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML

#21182241
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51036) - you deserved it (5909)

On 06/20/2014 at 7:03pm - health - by legitfile.bat.virus.exe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a fly landed on my face. Before I could even react, my brother "helpfully" punched it hard enough to both kill the fly and knock me out. FML

#21182108
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41865) - you deserved it (4250)

On 06/20/2014 at 5:00pm - health - by blackchin III (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, my brother got pantsed by his idiot friends. It was a surprise to everyone that he was wearing women's underwear at the time, but even more of a surprise for me that the underwear belonged to me. FML

#21175491
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46099) - you deserved it (4205)

On 06/15/2014 at 2:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 8-year-old son microwaved his pet hamster. FML

#21173596
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53123) - you deserved it (8962)

On 06/13/2014 at 6:53pm - animals - by sunil (man) - Canada (Alberta)



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