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beef_weezle

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beef_weezle

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 3286
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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beef_weezle's page activity

Visits<b>mgrazi99</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 11:38pm<b>ibeliebvatic</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 2:49pm<b>Justinr017</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 1:42pm<b>mrmcmuffins</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 1:18pm

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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beef_weezle's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom called me a "heartless bitch" for eating the last Hot Pocket. This is coming from a woman who, just last week, faked having cancer to get out of a speeding ticket. FML

#20511194
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36699) - you deserved it (2280)

On 02/17/2013 at 7:24pm - misc - by DontGetSlapped - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML

#20510302
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41926) - you deserved it (9715)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Notaplacetogo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML

#20509476
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32394) - you deserved it (7367)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm - money - by an idiot (man) - Australia

Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML

#20503125
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40954) - you deserved it (8184)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:59pm - intimacy - by thefriedman (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dog ate a whole case of my son's paintballs, because apparently they are made of a fish bi-product. Not only does the whole house smell like fish, there are countless bright yellow dog turds all over the house and our yard. FML

#20502144
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31973) - you deserved it (3948)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:48am - animals - by firestar772 - United States (California)

Today, my roommate found an eviction notice on our door for unpaid rent. Our apartment building caught fire and we haven't been living there for well over a month because it was legally unlivable. Today was our first day back. FML

#20500469
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32681) - you deserved it (2008)

On 02/10/2013 at 1:08am - money - by fireenginemad - United States (Washington)

Today, my kitten made it snow inside my house using a 12-pack of toilet paper. FML

#20495653
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26406) - you deserved it (5009)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:00pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon" and ended the same conversation with "and that's why we should divorce." FML

#20495499
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44931) - you deserved it (4148)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:38am - love - by PokeWife (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML

#20494543
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35915) - you deserved it (3284)

On 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm - misc - by Experience (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my friend asked me to fix his laptop for him because it is loaded with viruses. When I turned it on and started searching for the problem, I couldn't find it. Luckily I was able to find a video of him banging my girlfriend. We've been together for eight years. FML

#20493182
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72826) - you deserved it (4242)

On 02/04/2013 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by hamandegger (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML

#20493004
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56216) - you deserved it (3676)

On 02/04/2013 at 12:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after heavy rain my street flooded. While in my living room, I looked outside to see that my elderly neighbour was outside splashing in a knee deep puddle. He was butt-naked and wearing a snorkel and flippers. FML

#20492744
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27876) - you deserved it (3213)

On 02/04/2013 at 4:15am - misc - by Stunned (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I was given a wedgie by a complete stranger in a crowded bar. FML

#20492051
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27531) - you deserved it (2900)

On 02/03/2013 at 8:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was running late for work and quickly grabbed my outfit from the dryer. I heard the crackling of static as I took out my shirt. I didn't think anything of it, until later when my co-worker pointed out I had a thong stuck to my back. FML

#20491168
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28614) - you deserved it (7389)

On 02/03/2013 at 2:32am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48797) - you deserved it (6254) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version



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