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beclaurela

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beclaurela

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 April 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2461
  • Number of comments : 166
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About beclaurela : A Lauren is a very strange being. The Lauren isn't exactly human. More like a god. A Lauren is usually into very disturbing horror movies, and laughs at the gore that makes weaker men vomit. She enjoys punk music and just being weird and funny. Laurens are usually very beautiful, however they don't think so at all. On the outside, she's stubborn, a little mean, some might even say bitchy. But inside, she's the nicest, most caring person ever, but only if you get to know her. I advise you not piss off a Lauren, 'cause she will fucking mutilate you. Laurens are guy magnets, even if they refuse to acknowledge it. A Lauren will make you smile right away, with her sarcastic comebacks and twisted sense of humor. Laurens are usually picky with guys so if one likes you, you're a lucky bastard. They make the best friends, they can be sweet (sometimes) and they're not afraid to stand up and be a raving bitch when called for. You'd be lucky to know one, I know I am:] - Thank you Urbandictionary

beclaurela's page activity

Visits<b>batman342</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 2:45pm<b>Paradoxxxx</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 10:26am<b>DreamBigDollFace</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 5:06am<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 4:03pm<b>Aero_x</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 4:21am<b>erinblackk</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 4:41pm<b>king_of_LA</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 12:14am<b>ZombieGuyCXV</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 4:15pm<b>drewski_14</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 7:51pm<b>Wonder_Woman257</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 7:48pm<b>smiley1014</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 12:26pm<b>aPerfectWorld</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 2:29pm<b>SarahFuckingMae</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 1:35am<b>alllisonnn</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 4:44pm<b>Jaaared_</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 4:56pm<b>lchentite</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 3:59pm<b>missycanfly</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 1:50am<b>pikachulove14</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 1:39pm

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beclaurela's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31029) - you deserved it (14721)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend went down on me. I don't know why, but my mind wandered. He now thinks that he has the skills of a porn star, while I'm pretty sure that finally solving a mathematical problem I've been working on for a week caused me to orgasm. FML

#20963297
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48197) - you deserved it (8030)

On 11/19/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by you+me-clothes=53>< (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, I found out that when you flush an animal clear of blood for research, there is a nerve inside the heart, which when you strike it right, electrical signals cause the animal to writhe as if alive. Now, my boss knows about my fear of zombies, and I'm now terrified of half my job. FML

#20953149
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37246) - you deserved it (4867)

On 11/10/2013 at 8:52pm - work - by kittkatt1 - United States (Michigan)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43304) - you deserved it (5254)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend left me for another girl. My dad's reaction to the news and my tears was to say, "Aww. Gonna write a song about it, Taylor Swift?" FML

#20942725
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52537) - you deserved it (7655)

On 11/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, trying to be romantic, I started coming on to my wife while in bed, only for her to yet again say she wasn't in the mood. When I asked why she never is lately, she sarcastically blamed it on the government shutdown, then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

#20916670
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51728) - you deserved it (5628)

On 10/11/2013 at 5:00pm - intimacy - by (-__- ) ( ^.^) (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML

#20886441
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38488) - you deserved it (16689)

On 09/18/2013 at 10:53am - animals - by OldHabitsDieHard - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, as I started my car, I heard the most horrific sounds coming from the engine. When I lifted the hood I realized I'd found my son's cat. FML

Today, as I was getting my nails done at a salon, the owner pulled my head back against the chair in front of all the customers and began to tweeze my eyebrows. When I exclaimed that I didn't pay for that service, she replied, "I don't care. This needs done." FML

#20882967
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39971) - you deserved it (11362)

On 09/15/2013 at 9:21pm - misc - by BaMiTsAnYa (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She pretended like it never happened. FML

Today, I came out of the closet. Now whenever I'm getting ready to go somewhere with my dad he says, "Lesgo, lesbo." FML

#20876692
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54459) - you deserved it (12201)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:17am - misc - by spiritbeast33 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I put scribbles, lines, shapes and random words on my calendar just to make it seem like I was busy. This isn't the first time. FML

#20867690
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29111) - you deserved it (7940)

On 09/04/2013 at 5:07pm - misc - by cherbear1000 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to my first class of the year. The first thing the teacher said was, "I hate this f*cking school." FML

#20867651
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34311) - you deserved it (2653)

On 09/04/2013 at 4:39pm - misc - by swana99 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

#20858245
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55880) - you deserved it (4422)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Thanks everyone (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my mom visited my new apartment for the first time. I was showing her the bedroom, when she looked into my opened sock drawer and said, "Using Durex, eh? Yeah, you were born 'cause a Trojan split." FML

#20852599
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41065) - you deserved it (4245)

On 08/24/2013 at 6:05pm - kids - by thanks mom ¬_¬ (man) - United States (California)



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