Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

barlessprison

Offline (the 12/04/2014 at 12:59pm) | Search for a member

barlessprison

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 June 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 65998
  • Number of comments : 326
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About barlessprison : I have bad taste and I'm always eating at any given point in time.

barlessprison's page activity

Visits<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 2:13pm<b>scottyboy417</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 9:52am<b>xxreikoxx</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 2:52pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 5:14pm<b>poolguy69</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 11:54pm<b>suckmideck</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 3:54am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 10:02pm<b>Juicenub</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 4:51pm<b>jinx1995</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:22pm<b>Usuario</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:46pm<b>tagallopes</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 12:35am<b>Cortezthe1st</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 12:30pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 9:10pm<b>Journiexo</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:09am<b>aditya831</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 1:13am<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 11:08pm<b>Aero_x</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 12:17am<b>Erin2009</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 4:07pm

barlessprison's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of barlessprison's badges

barlessprison's favorite FMLs

Today, my mum decided to teach me a lesson about carelessly leaving my wallet about. She left it on the floor so our puppy could use it and its contents as a chew toy. I was almost impressed to discover that he can eat three £20 notes and still have room for debit cards. FML

#8971410
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22488) - you deserved it (8111)

On 03/10/2010 at 1:37pm - money - by MR (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up because I really had to pee. I got out of bed, went to the bathroom and went back to bed. Or so I thought. I did pee, but I only dreamed that I got out of bed. FML

#8972431
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28750) - you deserved it (3788)

On 03/10/2010 at 12:56pm - misc - by watersport (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my parents took my laptop, cut the Internet, took my car keys and TV, and removed my bedroom door. Why? Because they thought the plant I was growing for my science project was a marijuana plant. Oh yeah, they took that too. My presentation is tomorrow. FML

#8965755
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32578) - you deserved it (2381)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:39am - misc - by Kevin - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she was doing the dishes. I walked up behind her, touched her shoulder, and said "Poke". She then donkey kicks me straight in the nuts saying "Kick". I know now to never bug my mom when she's in a bad mood. FML

#8905229
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8807) - you deserved it (32784)

On 03/07/2010 at 10:08pm - misc - by Numbnuts (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was home alone. It was very dark and so I went to turn on the lights, when I heard the sound of a gun loading. I dropped to the floor but never heard a gun fire. I got up and heard the sound again. When I got lights on, I discovered it was only my printer telling me it was out of paper. FML

#8882513
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8852) - you deserved it (21777)

On 03/07/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by OhaiiKid (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was on the city bus, and there was a woman and her child sitting behind me. I began to feel tugging on my jacket so I leaned forward, assuming the child was pulling at my jacket. I sat back and felt the tugging again. After a couple of minutes, I heard the mother say "stop chewing on that!" FML

#8746322
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24202) - you deserved it (2352)

On 03/01/2010 at 11:59am - kids - by nd.11 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561
454 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7249) - you deserved it (53585)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking with a friend after buying two cups of steaming hot coffee. While crossing the busiest street in town I tripped and fell, spilling the coffee all over me. My friend didn't notice I fell right in front of her and tripped over me spilling her coffee on me as well. FML

#8528184
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20193) - you deserved it (2329)

On 02/21/2010 at 8:31pm - misc - by burnnnnn (woman) - Ecuador (Azuay)

Today, while playing Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, my phone rang, and I instinctively tried to pick it up with the Force. I kept trying until it stopped ringing. FML

#8480132
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6351) - you deserved it (40823)

On 02/20/2010 at 2:04pm - misc - by analinguist (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my husband and I took a walk on the wharf. We walked by a Wax Museum and in front of the museum there was a bench with a very realistic wax man sitting on it. I got very close to his face and yelled over to my husband how realistic the wax man looked. Just then, he coughed. FML

#8220919
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6892) - you deserved it (29907)

On 02/13/2010 at 8:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, in art class, I tried to attract my crush's attention by slowly sitting down in front of him. Too bad I missed the chair and fell onto the floor. FML

#8038952
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8531) - you deserved it (29944)

On 02/09/2010 at 12:50am - love - by Unknown (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I took my cat to the vet. He said he felt a strange lump that could be serious. I got really upset and picked her up, crying. The vet then told me I had to put her down. Absolutely devastated by having to euthanize my cat, I passed out. He meant I had to put her back on the table. FML

#7932396
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25162) - you deserved it (12901)

On 02/06/2010 at 10:19am - animals - by sadcat (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my godmother informed me that the rule of thumb my ex had used for our relationship during a year of cohabitation was taken directly from a Cesar Millan book on "How to train dogs." FML

#7492319
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19244) - you deserved it (2870)

On 01/22/2010 at 1:17am - love - by housebroken (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I was falling and woke up smashing my face on the desk. Everyone laughed. FML

#7459742
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21874) - you deserved it (7716)

On 01/20/2010 at 6:19pm - health - by M_Kclift1994 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was vacuuming our house because I wanted to help my parents. I wore a headset while listening to REALLY loud music. The vacuuming job took me two hours and when I took of my headset I noticed that I hadn't started the vacuum cleaner. FML

#7415658
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9302) - you deserved it (58784)

On 01/18/2010 at 6:01am - misc - by Adrian16 (man) - Norway (Vestfold)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: