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banstrom17

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banstrom17

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  • Number of visits : 1009
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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banstrom17's page activity

Visits<b>Rizzen</b> - the 12/13/2013 at 9:58am

banstrom17's FML badges

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It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favourites

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banstrom17's favorite FMLs

Today, while skiing, I really needed to pee. The instructor pointed me towards some bushes. I slid over to them, and pulled my panties down. My skis then started sliding back down the slope. I ended up gliding through the bushes, all the way down to the rest of the group. FML

#14670797
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28322) - you deserved it (7520) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/22/2011 at 3:49am - misc - by sandra22 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I met my father for the first time since I was a baby. The first comment out of his mouth was, "I bet all the boys love those motherfucking bazongas, don't they?" Hi, Dad. FML

#14396481
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42349) - you deserved it (3261)

On 12/30/2010 at 2:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, my mom thought it would be a good idea for me to talk with a British accent during my job interview to make me sound smarter. I'm applying for a job at McDonald's. FML

#14394529
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25287) - you deserved it (4848)

On 12/30/2010 at 10:37am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML

#14333152
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41894) - you deserved it (8760)

On 12/25/2010 at 8:38am - intimacy - by Jessie - United States (Texas)

Today, my 5 year old son and I went out. As I was looking in the window display of a shop, I turned around to witness my son pooping in an open manhole on the street. FML

#13718140
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28494) - you deserved it (8640)

On 11/04/2010 at 7:54pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38120) - you deserved it (9645)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML

#12332692
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40904) - you deserved it (3461)

On 08/05/2010 at 2:24pm - love - by kiki - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I watched a stray dog hump a garden gnome in my front yard. So did my two year old daughter. I've already had to stop her "re-enactments" twice. FML

#11806163
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33433) - you deserved it (4308)

On 07/11/2010 at 4:05am - intimacy - by awkwardsituation - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I finally got my first kiss. I was so excited, I pissed myself. FML

#11324047
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40136) - you deserved it (27127)

On 06/20/2010 at 1:12am - love - by PissyPants (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML

#8416746
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27334) - you deserved it (2388)

On 02/18/2010 at 7:44pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that the reason I don't want to stay overnight at his house is because I still occasionally wet the bed. FML

#7614301
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36106) - you deserved it (7289)

On 01/27/2010 at 3:33pm - health - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after an amazing sex session, my boyfriend rolls over and stares lovingly into my eyes, puts his hand on my cheek caressing it tenderly... and says "Who's a good piggy?" in his best Homer Simpson's voice. FML

#5562076
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23823) - you deserved it (4464)

On 09/30/2009 at 4:28am - intimacy - by homersgirl (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I missed my bus by a minute. I called up my step dad asking him if he can drive me because I had a test first period. After about calling him twenty times, and him not picking up, I see him drive by the bus stop pointing at me and laughing hysterically. FML

#5448757
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40958) - you deserved it (3829)

On 09/24/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by NotFunny (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my five year old daughter told me that while I'm at work, daddy has his wrestling buddy Melinda over. She also said that they wrestle on the bed so that they won't get hurt. FML

#4867119
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77894) - you deserved it (3396)

On 08/27/2009 at 7:57pm - love - by abercrombieef (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML

#4329775
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65650) - you deserved it (11974)

On 08/06/2009 at 6:05am - intimacy - by OhFseriously123 (man) - Italy (Lombardia)



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