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banhart28's FML badges
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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banhart28's favorite FMLs
by cjy152 / 09/21/2011 at 10:44am / United States (Ohio) / Love
Today, my boss sat me down to discuss the sounds my co-workers have heard coming from my cubicle. Apparently my music sounds like the background tracks from shitty soft-core porn movies. I'm getting a three day suspension while they go through all my files. FML
by ImScrewed / 08/02/2011 at 1:47pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, as a prank, a friend and I tied a 10 dollar bill to a fishing line, and yanked it away from people as they reached for it. It was going really well until one of our victims pulled a knife and chased us around the block. FML
by Jackassed / 05/12/2011 at 1:53pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, leaving the restaurant I work in, the car next to mine was very crookedly parked. I had a hard time backing out. It turned out the whole restaurant was watching me, and they all started to clap as I drove away. FML
by parkingisawesome / 05/05/2011 at 8:35pm / United States / Transportation
by me / 01/13/2011 at 3:48pm / United States / Kids
Today, I figured out why my name is Ashley. In order to tell my older sister about getting a new little sister, my parents thought it would be a good idea to make her imaginary friend "Ashley" real. FML
by Anonymous / 12/18/2010 at 4:03am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/06/2010 at 8:42pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, my stalker - an annoying guy who's dedicated the past three years of his life to stalking me at every turn - somehow got a hold of my number and started texting me at 10pm about how I have no life. FML
by nolife / 11/05/2010 at 7:14pm / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/24/2010 at 3:20pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals
by Anonymous / 09/20/2010 at 3:10am / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Work
Today, my 24 year old girlfriend plugged her ears and stomped her feet while making really loud noises in our local video store. She then refused to stop until I agreed to rent and watch The Notebook with her. FML
by Anonymous / 08/06/2010 at 12:34pm / United States (New York) / Love
by DaddyZ / 06/27/2010 at 9:30am / United States (Michigan) / Kids
Today, both my parents were at work so I was home alone. My boyfriend had wanted to surprise me and take me out to lunch. He found me dancing on my kitchen table singing "Like a Virgin" at the top of my lungs. FML
by crazygirl10 / 05/28/2010 at 4:37pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/19/2010 at 1:05am / United States (California) / Love
Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML
by Concussed / 01/17/2010 at 1:22am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…