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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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badkaty1

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badkaty1
  • Town/Country : Clovis, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 2 February 1992 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 293
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Today, I was going to the bathroom. As I was about to wipe, I noticed that the toilet paper had butterflies printed on it. Never before had I felt bad for wiping my ass. FML

#7196823 (44)

I agree, your life sucks (5174) - you deserved it (16822)

On 01/07/2010 at 9:43am - misc - by Doomy (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

#6937557 (132)

I agree, your life sucks (22656) - you deserved it (5106)

On 12/25/2009 at 11:15am - kids - by BathroomMuch (man) - United States (California)

Today, I left work to find a note on my windshield that read, "I think you're cute," with a phone number written down as well. I got super excited and immediately dialed. The phone was answered by a woman laughing hysterically. It was my Mom. FML

#6716817 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (26094) - you deserved it (4366)

On 12/12/2009 at 12:23am - love - by MarkTheShark (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I spent 30 minutes trying to find my glasses. I don't know whats worse, the fact that I was wearing them the whole time, or that my girlfriend played along and helped me look for them. FML

#6594028 (85)

I agree, your life sucks (6904) - you deserved it (19851)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by wobbles (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was putting my contacts in when my daughter decided to jump on me from behind to scare me, causing me to poke myself in the eye. I'm now wearing an eye patch due to a scratched cornea while my daughter is singing some song titled "You are a pirate". FML

#6284625 (121)

I agree, your life sucks (22407) - you deserved it (1866)

On 11/13/2009 at 5:06am - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore

Today, I told my friends I had been hiding something that I wanted to come clean on. My one friend responds by saying, "FINALLY you come out of the closet. It's about time." I'm not gay. I was just going to tell them my parents were getting a divorce. FML

#6241973 (52)

I agree, your life sucks (20067) - you deserved it (2907)

On 11/10/2009 at 11:25am - misc - by ClosetMishap (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was informed by my next door neighbor that they heard me singing in the shower last night. I laughed and she told me that the family gathers in their upstairs room closest to my bathroom window to guess which song I'm singing. Every night. FML

#5971275 (97)

I agree, your life sucks (21815) - you deserved it (4179)

On 10/24/2009 at 6:27am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump. FML

#5910203 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (34887) - you deserved it (4198)

On 10/20/2009 at 6:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to buy my prom dress. I felt really good as I walked out of the dressing room, until someone walked out of the room next to me wearing the same dress, and looked better in it than I did. It was a man buying it for his drag show. FML

#5815920 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (21468) - you deserved it (2536)

On 10/13/2009 at 1:26pm - misc - by draggirl (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML

#5721676 (267)

I agree, your life sucks (60679) - you deserved it (3856)

On 10/08/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I ran into my parents bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door my parents were on top of each other laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML

#5109294 (134)

I agree, your life sucks (44906) - you deserved it (1955)

On 09/07/2009 at 5:20pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

#4882481 (409)

I agree, your life sucks (52118) - you deserved it (11878)

On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my boyfriend and his parents met my family. My grandpa thought it would be funny to walk around with a realistic gun and make references about being in the mafia. The rest of my family went along with it. FML

#4782445 (184)

I agree, your life sucks (29814) - you deserved it (3565)

On 08/24/2009 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML

#2812014 (269)

I agree, your life sucks (73318) - you deserved it (13613)

On 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by NoBalls (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710 (1201)

I agree, your life sucks (55735) - you deserved it (136025)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)