Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

badassmf1234

Online | Search for a member

badassmf1234

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 7 December 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5789
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

badassmf1234's page activity

Visits<b>starw0lf</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 6:01pm<b>Waspinator1998</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 3:24am<b>jojo69b</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 4:55am<b>roll_it_up</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 10:14pm<b>hippodamia</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 2:25pm<b>aliyyyyyah22</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 8:54am<b>bamagrl410</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 4:04am<b>Awesomeaxel</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:50pm<b>maemismile</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 11:57am<b>FMLIND33D</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 7:16am<b>Sawsaiuge</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 3:10am<b>Phoebe_Buffay</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:36am<b>Dennisse_47</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:27am<b>chrisbot5555</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:18am<b>eyesak</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 1:15am<b>bmackdaddy12</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:50am<b>blackphoenix0010</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:45am<b>CaptMurdock</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 12:26am

badassmf1234's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of badassmf1234's badges

badassmf1234's favorite FMLs

Today, it's my fourth day of my trip to the USA. I've actually started keeping count of the number of times people get confused because I was born in South Africa and yet am not black. Current count: 9. FML

#21245756
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35616) - you deserved it (3154)

On 08/26/2014 at 12:22pm - misc - by WTF, guys? - United States (California)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42934) - you deserved it (8312)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that the reason my boyfriend hasn't texted me recently is that he'd forgotten he was dating anyone. FML

#21244761
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36824) - you deserved it (4356)

On 08/24/2014 at 11:27pm - love - by angry girlfriend - United States (Indiana)

Today, a guy took me out on a date. His imaginary friends joined us. FML

#21244154
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35998) - you deserved it (2956)

On 08/24/2014 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after a long silent and awkward pause after asking my girlfriend's dad if I can take her on holiday for Christmas, he looked me dead in the eyes and said "No, you may not impregnate my daughter." FML

#21243591
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37441) - you deserved it (4619)

On 08/23/2014 at 3:34am - intimacy - by Dafuq happen there - South Africa

Today, I finally told my dad that I hate his girlfriend. I said her daughter's a complete whore, and her son is annoying as fuck. Turns out they were in the house and within earshot, ready to throw me a birthday party. FML

#21243310
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22324) - you deserved it (41338)

On 08/22/2014 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my dad stopped me mid-sentence and said he wanted to punch me in the face and set me on fire for using the word "selfie". FML

#21243189
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20900) - you deserved it (35805)

On 08/22/2014 at 2:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend sent me pictures of him and his family on their trip in Florida. He accidentally included a picture of a girl sleeping in his bed, naked. FML

#21242918
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46203) - you deserved it (3193)

On 08/22/2014 at 2:02am - love - by lolatmylife - United States

Today, I went on my first date in 8 years. While we were looking at the menu, the guy said: "So if you're vegetarian, why're you so fat?" FML

#21241880
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40603) - you deserved it (6795)

On 08/20/2014 at 6:14pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my dad and I got into an argument, and he ended up calling me a son of a bitch. My mom heard and started arguing with him over him calling her a bitch. Three hours later, I'm now staying at my gran's house with my mom and hoping her threats of a divorce weren't for real. FML

#21241796
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38249) - you deserved it (2822)

On 08/20/2014 at 4:08pm - misc - by sonofaneuroticwench (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks found the engagement ring I tried to give to my ex. She started crying and said yes. FML

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

#21241016
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41739) - you deserved it (15749)

On 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was waiting at a stop light in the left turn lane, when a homeless guy on the sidewalk walked up to my car with a, "Bet you can't hit me with a quarter" sign. The lady on my right decided to throw a quarter at him, but it missed and hit my windshield. She yelled, "Oh fuck!" and drove away. FML

Today, I learned that when someone is choking you don't do the "hymen maneuver", you do the "heimlich maneuver". I was corrected by my girlfriend's parents. FML

#21240474
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30678) - you deserved it (13593)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm - misc - by FANZZY - United States (New York)

Today, my two-year-old daughter's favourite word is 'No'. After leaving her with my sixteen-year-old brother, she now knows other N words as well. Niet, Nein, Non and Never. Her teenage uncle thinks it's hilarious. FML

#21240415
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34486) - you deserved it (5574)

On 08/18/2014 at 9:26am - kids - by 919191 (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: