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azrael_xx

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azrael_xx

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Sunday 1 October 1989 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3093
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About azrael_xx : Blargh

azrael_xx's page activity

Visits<b>Sinester69</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 12:59pm<b>youtubetre</b> - the 07/20/2012 at 12:21pm<b>gfonz</b> - the 07/19/2012 at 12:28am<b>manaia18</b> - the 09/09/2011 at 8:11pm<b>sexxme</b> - the 07/27/2011 at 3:29am

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azrael_xx's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a call from a creditor asking for a Sarah. I told them that I'm not Sarah, nor do I know one. They then asked if she was my wife. Annoyed, I said, "Alright, when did I get a wife? I don't even remember having a girlfriend." They sniggered and hung up. FML

#17175800
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25124) - you deserved it (6723)

On 07/19/2011 at 10:41am - misc - by Miriden - United States

Today, after being in love with one of my best friends for ages, he took me on a date. We then went back to his place and we made love. Afterwards, he told me he wanted to show me something and led me outside. He ran back in and locked the door. It's a two hour walk home. FML

#17174791
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52376) - you deserved it (6684)

On 07/19/2011 at 7:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, a group of girl-scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought 2 bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML

#17172932
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40990) - you deserved it (6282)

On 07/19/2011 at 2:24am - kids - by hatemylife - United States (New York)

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37277) - you deserved it (3287)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, we found out why we were getting notes on our door telling us to "move out or else." As my mom works for the government and we have a direct-TV dish on our roof, our neighbor thinks we were sent to listen to his phone calls and read his mind. We were here before he was. FML

#17154480
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28431) - you deserved it (2295)

On 07/17/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by SonOfaSpy (man) - United States

Today, I forced myself into work with severe laryngitis. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, except I work at candy and ice cream store at a major tourist destination. For seven hours I had to communicate with unsympathetic adults and screaming, bratty kids by miming and using a dry erase board. FML

#17152929
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22724) - you deserved it (7802)

On 07/17/2011 at 7:29pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38421) - you deserved it (2719)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38421) - you deserved it (2719)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34534) - you deserved it (7577)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at a club with my friends, when a group of guys approached us. It got quiet for a second, and I heard one of them say, "It's okay, I've got the fat one this time," then walk over and start talking to me. FML

#17145151
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32729) - you deserved it (7268)

On 07/17/2011 at 2:24am - misc - by grenade (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at work, our team started a new sales strategy of selling flowers to men by asking them to buy one for their lovely ladies. The first guy I ask ends up crying and telling me his wife passed away a week ago. The woman with him was actually his sister. FML

#17144161
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30655) - you deserved it (4552)

On 07/17/2011 at 1:16am - work - by Auston (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I Googled my ex-husband only to find that in the years since we've split he now fancies himself as a stand-up comic. His material? Our sex life. FML

#17143306
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36257) - you deserved it (8479)

On 07/17/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by it_IS_just_me (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my 16 year-old daughter to get a bank account, taking her birth certificate with us as requested. When the teller wrote her name down on a piece of paper, my daughter said "How do you know my name?" The teller just looked at her and held up her birth certificate. I raised a nitwit. FML

#17063705
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29513) - you deserved it (11308)

On 07/11/2011 at 5:25am - kids - by Mothering (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had the most exciting dream of my life. I was dreaming about catching a shiny charmander. I'm 15, and instead of dreaming of girls, I'm dreaming of Pokémon. FML

#16909818
463 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29800) - you deserved it (16565)

On 06/29/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by wispywee - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to my phone company and had my text history pulled. Why? Because a few days ago my 4 year old daughter told me that, "Daddy has a wife and a girlfriend." Turns out she was right. FML

#16176534
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43556) - you deserved it (3911)

On 05/14/2011 at 7:35pm - love - by Clueless (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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